Shovel jokes
I will always remember my uncle's last words, "What's the shovel for?"
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
My family is like a treasure.
You need a map and shovel to find them.
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park.
Lord: "Has something happened while I was gone?"
Gardener: "Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burying your dog."
Lord: "My dog died?!"
Gardener: "Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down."
Lord: "My mansion?! How?!"
Gardener: "Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains."
Lord: "Why was she so distraught?"
Gardener: "She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped."
Lord: "My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?!"
Gardener: "Oh right! Your cancer test results!"
A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.
Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"
Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"
Joke.
The shovel is a ground breaking invention.
*Slaps and laughs*
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the concert?
Because he was about to BURY the COMPETITION!
9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.
2 people bought plants.
3 people bought shovels.
1 person yelled.
3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.
1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁♀️🤦♀️
Xd.
The invention of the shovel was groundbreaking.
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the studio?
Because he was digging for those UNDERGROUND BEATS!
How do you get a dishwasher to shovel snow? Give the bitch a shovel.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
I have a friend named Mole.
She plays a game called "sandbox" to dig up dirt...
My girlfriend is like treasure to me.
You need a shovel to find her.
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.