Car Accident jokes

What is stronger than family?

The tree Paul Walker hit.

A boy and his mother survived a car crash.

The boy asks his mother, "Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?" The mother replies with "More like an accident."

How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment...

I would name my dog "Five Miles" so I could say I walk five miles every day, but today I ran over Five Miles.

How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.

A man got in a bad car accident. He was at risk of losing his arm. The doctors had to perform complicated surgery on his arm. The man's wife visited after the surgery. The doctor came up to her and said:

"I have good news and bad news."

The wife said: "What's the good news?"

"We managed to save his arm."

"What's the bad news?"

"We couldn't save the rest of him."

What did Jenny get for her birthday after a car accident?

An amputation.

A lot of people ask why I only make jokes about Paul Walker and no one else.

Because they didn’t have as big of an impact as him.

Why did the boy get run over?

Sally was driving.

Racecar backwards is racecar, but racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.

What's the difference between Paul Walker's car and a petite white girl?

There is no difference.

They both got split open by a huge log.

I would make a Paul Walker joke, but it would crash and burn.

How do we know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

Because they found her head and shoulders in the glovebox.

I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.

He had a change of race tho when he died.

Why did Paul Walker cross the road?

He wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

I got in a car crash with a dwarf one day. He came storming out, and glared at me. I lowered my window and called out, "So, I'm guessing you're not happy?"

Americans be like: "Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road."

England be like: "Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road."

Russians after a car accident be like: "Here in Russia, road is road."

What’s loud, red and goes at 200mph?

Paul Walker’s Porsche.

REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.

I ran over my neighbor's cat last night, and I just want to say... that thing was fast! I had to run a red light to get it!