Car Accident

Car Accident Jokes

Car crash

A boy and his mother survived a car crash.

The boy asks his mother, "Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?" The mother replies with "More like an accident."

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  • Princess Diana

    How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

    They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment...

    Dog

    I would name my dog "Five Miles" so I could say I walk five miles every day, but today I ran over Five Miles.

    Man

    A man got in a bad car accident. He was at risk of losing his arm. The doctors had to perform complicated surgery on his arm. The man's wife visited after the surgery. The doctor came up to her and said:

    "I have good news and bad news."

    The wife said: "What's the good news?"

    "We managed to save his arm."

    "What's the bad news?"

    "We couldn't save the rest of him."

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  • Memes

    Shampoo

    How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his β€œhead and shoulders” in the dash.

    Paul Walker

    A lot of people ask why I only make jokes about Paul Walker and no one else.

    Because they didn’t have as big of an impact as him.

    Difference

    What's the difference between Paul Walker's car and a petite white girl?

    There is no difference.

    They both got split open by a huge log.

    Princess Diana

    How do we know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

    Because they found her head and shoulders in the glovebox.

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  • Dwarf

    I got in a car crash with a dwarf one day. He came storming out, and glared at me. I lowered my window and called out, "So, I'm guessing you're not happy?"

    Road

    Americans be like: "Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road."

    England be like: "Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road."

    Russians after a car accident be like: "Here in Russia, road is road."

    Paul Walker

    I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.

    He had a change of race tho when he died.

    Butt

    REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.