Kids in the backseat make accidents and accidents in the back seat make kids.
A cop stopped a guy for speeding.
He said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
"I was trying to keep up with traffic," the guy replied.
The cop said, "But there is no traffic."
And the guy answered, "That's how far behind I am."
Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head
-JFK
chuck Norris get`s pulled over by cop and the cop gets a ticket
When the speedbump in a school zone screams so you go faster
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Wen you run over a speed bump in a school zone and you remember that there are no speed bumps.
the toilet paper tried to cross the road he couldnt because he was stuck in a CRACK
Why didn't Sally get home from work.
She got hit by a bus
What did the green light say to the red light - don't look I'm changing
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
Comebacks when someone say Bully: Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic. Say: At least its brighter than your future
Credit x/@jesopa
You know that if it says adopt a highway and no one does were driving on orphans
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? to get to the other side
How does the zebra cross the road . The zebra crossing
whats the fastest way to get to the hospital? stand in the middle of the road
What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?
Mooooooooooo along
Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic
Has anybody heard of the guy who passed out in the middle of oncoming traffic? yeah, he was tired.