Aed jokes
Q: Why can't a blonde call 911?
A: Because she can't find the 11.
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.
What do you call a lazy piece of meat?
A meatloaf.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
An e-girl went to go high five a tree, but the tree left her hanging.
One day I threw a boomerang...
Now I live in constant fear.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick. Get your head out of the gutters... Jeez!
A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.
The lady says, "Come again!"
The blonde says, "No, it's toothpaste this time."
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
What's in a man's mouth when he realizes he's gay?
A dick.
Why was everybody so tired on April 1st? Because they just finished a March of 31 days!
Q: Why do orphans get on Facebook?
A: Because they get liked.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.