My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.

Your mum

Me: Want to hear a joke? Friend: Sure Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me. Friend: What’s funny about that? Me: Because the next day they disowned me.

The teacher asked,"why are you in school on a saturday?" I told her my mum told me to go to hell.

Yesterday I was f...ing my sister and she said’ you f... a lot like dad I said “really mum said that too.”

An American mother has 3 children. The first child asked his mum: 'Why is my sister caleed Crasy horse and my brother Rushing water?' Mum: Because those were the first thing I saw after i gave birth to them. Why are you asking all these questions 2 dogs f...ing?

your mum is so poor she cant afford free samples

My mum touch my friend but she wasn’t the she’s only 12

Yo mama so short, when it rains she’s the last to know!

Yo mama so smelly, whenever she steps outside she pollutes the air!

Your mum is so fat Les Dawson would agree with me that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.

why did your mum touch me because she was a pedo

Hey mum why do people keep suddenly dying in our family? Mum? Mum? Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!

ur mum gay

why was aarons mum sad the bus missed aaron

Your mum is so fat she gets hit by a parked car

YO MAMA is soooooo FAT that she was arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK!!!

If you have a daughter, give it the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer you get two beers and when you call for sex you get two sex…

Your mum gay lol

2 mums hook up! Their daughter comes in the room and says which ones the baby daddy? the “mum” points to the woman who was actually a man!

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