My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.
Me: Want to hear a joke? Friend: Sure Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me. Friend: What’s funny about that? Me: Because the next day they disowned me.
Yesterday I was f...ing my sister and she said’ you f... a lot like dad I said “really mum said that too.”
An American mother has 3 children. The first child asked his mum: 'Why is my sister caleed Crasy horse and my brother Rushing water?' Mum: Because those were the first thing I saw after i gave birth to them. Why are you asking all these questions 2 dogs f...ing?
Your mum is so fat Les Dawson would agree with me that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.
Hey mum why do people keep suddenly dying in our family? Mum? Mum? Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!
If you have a daughter, give it the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer you get two beers and when you call for sex you get two sex…
2 mums hook up! Their daughter comes in the room and says which ones the baby daddy? the “mum” points to the woman who was actually a man!