Two girls are at a play and are about to go on the stage.
Ally before the other girl gos on stage: break a leg!
Rachel: alright!
On stage, Rachel trips over a stand and breaks her leg
Rachel calling backstage: I broke my leg!
One day i was passing a blind man and i gave him a gun and told him it was a blow dryer next day i went for another walk and saw his grave
Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer A: she fell into a minefield
What did they find in Paul walkers glovebox? His head and shoulders.
who crashed the plane? 1. Abu Faram?- terrorist 2. The little kid Joseph? 3. The passed out pilot?
OR JAMAL?
I can't tell whats farther the great wall of China or how far Paul Walker flew out his windshield
there was this boy he had diarrhea and he kept asking to go to the bathroom but the teacher said no next ting you know he poop his self infront of the class.
So this one time i saw Sally trying to get up after she fell off the swing, and i helped her up and she said ''Thank you '' and i said your welcome. The next day i saw her legs and someone said '' I would not do that'' and i said '' Whatever'' i tapped sally and the top halve fell I said ''WHAT HAPPENED TO SALLY. And someone said she went in a mine field.
I was arrest for eating to much crack on accident. How? My sister came into my room shoving her ass in my face
Did you hear how Steven Hawkins Died? There was a mix up and he was dropped at pc world instead of A&E!
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend. Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, the sharks are not even bothering him! And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
Jack and jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town game him a frown and his arms were pricked
What did the car say when it crashed? Thats Wheely unfortunate.
I saw a yellow bus and I knew that some-ting was wrong.
The bus was white.
why cant Helen Keller drive. Because she's a women no seriosly why can't she drive. Because she's dead.
You work at Papa's Pizzeria, ok?
Boss: You're fired!
Me: Ok?
Worker: Why are you fired?
Me: Oh, you wanna know...
*shows him the oven with my pizza*
Me: I left my pizza in the oven, that bitch burnt as fuck!!
Worker: OH SHIT!!
Boss: Did you say pizza?
Me: I sure did!
*shows boss pizza in oven*
Me: This hoe black as fuck!
Boss: I fired you because I can't stop looking at your ass, not this why?
Why did sally run into a tree? She is blind
What’s worse than dropping your ice cream ?
The Holocoust
My sister got in a car crash a couple days ago. When she got to the hospital, the doctor told her that she needed to get metal mechanics in her leg. She got really scared and yelled at the doctor telling them that, “I will not get those implanted in my leg.” I guess she just doesn’t associate with knee gears.
Today I Vance a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!
