Ladder jokes

I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died.

“Are you still holding the ladder?”

My brother's addicted to buying ladders; he loves to get high.

Your mama is so stupid that when she heard drinks were on the house, she grabbed a ladder.

How many people do you need to change a lightbulb?

Three. The first holds the ladder, the second one holds the lightbulb, and the third one spins the ladder.

Why did the girl bring the ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school.

My wife is so fat.

She asked me to get on top; I had to get a step ladder. When I got up there, my ears popped, and the air was so thin. I had to have two Sherpas drag me off the mountain.

I will always remember my grandpa's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.

Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar? Because she heard the drinks were on the house.

My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"

How many children does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw.

I only remember my father's last words before he died. He said, "Are you still holding the ladder?"

I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"

Yo mama so dumb, when the bartender said "beer is on the house" she grabbed a ladder.

I will never forget my grandpa's last words: "You still holding the ladder, son?"

I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words. They wanted to hear them. They are: "you still holding the ladder?"

I was trying to hang the lights when I accidentally kicked the chair.

I will never forget my grandfather's last words:

"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"

I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.

Oh wait, I'm thinking of...

Grandfather's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

Grandmother's last words: "You know how to use that hammer."

Dad's last words: "Always aim before you shoot that gun."

Mom's last words: "Turn off the stove when you're done."

My last thought: Am I a murderer?