Die

Scott

Stop making 9/11 jokes, my father died in a plane crash

Best pilot in Saudi Arabia

Computer

Anonymous

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

Computer

Anonymous

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.

Car

Anonymous

Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, “Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we’ve ever gotten to an accident site.”

Cold

Madison R.

A Blonde crashed A Helicopter. A Police Officer Asked Her What Happened. She Says, “It Got Cold So I Turned Off The Fan.”

Car

Anonymous

What do you take care of after a car crash? The witnesses

Puns

Jon

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

Twin Towers

Korbin

Why are the twin towers mad?

They ordered pepperoni pizza but all they got was plain.

Country

Anonymous

Three guys are on a plane one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American, and the Pilot says “There is to much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off.” So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said , “I have plenty of these where I come from,” the the Asian threw out some rice and said “I have plenty of these in my country,” The American threw out a bomb and said, “I have a lot of these in my country.” The plane crashes anyway and the three men start to walk away from the crash, as they were walking the found a boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of Buritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy,” The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of rice fell out of the sky and sherded all my clothes.” The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble, they kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny the boy said, “MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!”

Puns

Anonymous

What do need in order to crash a train?

A bad track record

Car

Anounymouse

A boy and his mother survived a car crash. The boy asks his mother “Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?” The mother replies with “More like an accident.”

Jesus

Anonymous

How did the blind Catholic get in a car crash? He asked Jesus to take the wheel.

Man

Wakanda

A man crashed his new expensive car into a tree He now knew how the Mercedes bends

Burning

9 11

I dont like 9 11 jokes they have a tendency to crash and burn

Body

best morbid jokes EVER

There was an air crash of a Boeing 737 - 800 which can carry around 300 passengers…

It crashed in a cemetery

They recovered 500 bodies

Name

your dad

Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?

Difference

Anonymous

Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.

Head

Anonymous

There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?

A pentagon!

(9/11 joke)

Car

Anonymous

A guy bought a AMG and crashed it, now he knows how the mercedes BENZ.

Wife

AnnoyingF...tard69

Levon Aronian’s wife died in a car crash. That’s wheelie unfortunate.

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