Crash jokes
What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?
Nothing.
Stop making 9/11 jokes, my father died in a plane crash.
Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head? A pentagon! (9/11 joke)
Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, "Wow, that's got to be the fastest we've ever gotten to an accident site."
Why are the twin towers mad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plain.
There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed, and they all went to heaven.
God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said, "I want to be handsome." God granted his wish. The second guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the first guy." God granted his wish. The third guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the second guy." God granted his wish, and this continued on and on until the 15th ugly guy. The ugly guy was laughing, really hard. "What is your wish?" God asked him. "I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!!!" God granted his wish.
What do you take care of after a car crash?
The witnesses.
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
I wish that people would stop mailing jokes about Kobe Bryant. Guys, all they do is crash and burn!
My aim is cursed; one of my Angry Birds hit a field.
A boy and his mother survived a car crash.
The boy asks his mother, "Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?" The mother replies with "More like an accident."
A collection of 911 jokes.
What kinda pizza did they order at 911?
Plane.
What was the color of 911?
Plane.
What is the fastest way to see 911?
Plane.
A blonde crashed a helicopter. A police officer asked her what happened. She says, "It got cold so I turned off the fan."
There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.
It crashed in a cemetery.
They recovered 500 bodies.
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
How did the blind Catholic get in a car crash? He asked Jesus to take the wheel.
I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.
The only thing brighter than my cuteness is the fire on the Twin Towers.
Welcome to the roadkill cafe, where yesterday's crash is today's cash.