Hide-and-Seek Jokes

Ever heard of the show "Naked and Afraid"? That's what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.

Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*

Why are gay people bad at hide and seek?

Because they're always coming out of the closet.

Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?

Because he's always spotted.

Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.

Welcome back to the hide and seek world championship! Osama Bin Laden vs. Anne Frank!

Boy and girl playing hide and seek... girl: I found you, Boy: what gave me away, Girl: ur parents obviously

What did me an my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid

Yo mama so stupid, she hides behind a glass door when playing hide and seek.

Why was the cheetah so bad at hide and seek ? No matter where she hid, she was always spotted.

Why don’t violists play hide and seek? Because no one will look for them.

Why is orphans bad at hide and seek ? Because they can’t find there parents

Why did Stephan Hawkins and his wife stop playing hide and seek - she kept using a metal detector

Why are gay people bad at hide and seek?

Because they’re always coming out of the closet

My dad and I have been playing hide and seek. It's been 15 years and I still haven't found him.

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon. 3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.” 4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop. 5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river. 6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils. 7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope. 8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. 9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match. 10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee. 11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”). 12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted. 13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. 14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat. 15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball. 16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing. 17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.