You jokes
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other?
LEAN BEEF!
What do you call a baby potato?
Small fry!
A man gets captured by cannibals.
Every day they poke him with spears and use his blood to wash down their food. Finally the guy calls the chief over and says, "You can kill me or you can eat me, but I'm tired of getting stuck for drinks."
At least if you're fat you don't need to put as much bathwater in the bath.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair? A TANK!
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving; you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
What do you call a black coconut?
A CoonConut.
What do you call a disabled Asian?
"Sum ting wong."
If you say the word "gullible" slowly, it will sound like you're saying "orange."
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock, she's probably just pulling your leg.
Hoes be like, "I've been through a lot."
No, a lot's been through you.
What do you call a woodpecker with no beak? A headbanger.
The mirror says: "If you break me, you will have 3 years of bad luck."
The Magic Jewel says: "If you break me, you will have 10 years of bad luck."
The condom just sitting there laughing.
What do you call a man with no hands? Clapless.
How do you properly eat a vegetable?
You tip over the wheelchair.
What do you call an Indian going through the bins?
RUM-MAJINGG
What does the Cow say to the spy?
"Are you udder cover?"
What do you call a girl who is thirsty for water?
An H2hoe.
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Students: "Meat."
Teacher: "Very good. Now what does the pig give you?"
Students: "Bacon."
Teacher: "And finally, what does the fat cow give you?"
One of the students: "Homework!"
A woman walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs.
The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea with that." The woman replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."