Blood

Gavboy

My cousin died last week he needed a blood transfusion but we didnt know his blood type he just kept saying “b positive b positive” but its hard to be positive with him gone

Ex

Anonymous

the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”😂

Light

dirty night clown

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I’ll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

Depression

LunaRosario16🙃😅➰〰️➰👌

If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.

Fire

Paralyzed Kid

My little cousin’s birthday was in a few days and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming “HOT WHEELS!”

Game

Anonymous

I brought my cousin to an arcade and I gave her 5$ to go play a game but she tugged my joy stick to hard

1

Sister

Anonymous

What’s the best part about plowing your cousin?

-It makes your sister jealous

1

Puns

Neon Lights

My Llama’s cousin sucks at going on vacation.

He just stands there; “I’ll pack uhhhh…”

Make

Anonymous

Cousins make dozens

Street

Anonymous

Cousins on the streets means lovers in the sheets😂👀

Depression

C00LIN

Is it normal my emo cousins hobby is tying himself to train tracks.

Fight

Billybigwillymonsterknob

One weekend some distant family members that I hadn’t met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn’t met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).

My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes, and told me they both ended up dying.

Well, SO-RRY but I didnt know they’re conjoined twins.

Night

Tyler_kemp65

So Dora is having a sleepover with her cousin Diego at Dora’s house. So later that night Dora’s mom hears someone screaming go Diego go for at least a couple of minutes and then it stops and goes back to sleep. But then hears the same thing a couple minutes later and walks in and hears go Diego go so she walks over to Diego’s sleeping bag a looks and it’s empty so she walks over to Dora’s sleeping bag and looks in and See’s Dora getting f… By Diego and hears Dora saying go Diego go while moaning.

2

Difference

Anonymous

Him: What’s The Difference Between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?

Her: What?

Him: Nothing, Either way you will be dating your Cousin

Fart

MY LIFE IS A JOKE

According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let’s shake it up a little.

  • That girl was hot.
  • She’s my cousin!

Name

Mini

I named my cousins parrot Michell and then I started to call Mikey Mikey right I’m starting to teach my cousin Sammy how to say Mikey Mikey and he says mekiy meiky 😆

Car

Anonymous

i was listening to wap in my car with my four year old cousin and she asked why they dont fix the holes in the house then my fucking boyfriend what a hoe was and pointed to me i pushed him out of the car and my other boyfriend took the front seat

Orphan

Yo boi

Max heart and his gay cousin nickals amoto say i back out a fight when he said let’s fight then last minute he said he don’t want to then says i chickened out i ready to fight but his gut swolled his arms he actually looks like humpty dumpty but just wanted to say he backed out + max and nickals are both gay with each other

Pillow

BigChodeOnlyXoX

Why did the pillow cross the road

Because his cousins name was Koshin and he didnt want to live anymore