You jokes

If you jump off a building and yell "parkour," how can they tell that it was intentional? T'was a failed stunt.

What do you call a wheelchair on fire?

Hot wheels.

Why are you so white?

Because you have no lotion on.

If your uncle Jack needed help getting off of a horse, would you help your uncle Jack off a horse?

What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?

The refrigerator won’t fart when you pull the meat out.

What do you call a tall terrorist?

Osama Bin Laden.

Yo mama so stupid, she failed a survey.

Girl: I’m so in love with you!

Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.

Girl: What’s the ijk?

Boy: I’m just kidding.

An advantage of being an orphan: the teacher can't give you any homework.

What do you call a 17-year-old orphan?

Homeless.

Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn’t all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.

What do you call the bell at the Asian restaurant?

I'm ta ping it, some ting won.

How do you anger a democrat?

Don't tell him the truth.

Why are you wearing a cap? Oh, I know, to cover your hairline!

Your hairline is so bad when you need a role model who has been having a tough life, you go to your barber.

You know why I only date disabled people? Cause they can't get away.

What do you call a rich Chinese child?

"Ching Ching..."

Marry or don't marry, you will regret both!

Do you know that no one finds Hitler a great guy?

But he really saved the History Channel.

Hang in there, you all, Literally.