Vegetable

Vegetable Jokes

Part

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?

The wheelchair. 😎

Memes

Song

What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”

What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”

What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”

Wheelchair

Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and a vegetable?

The vegetable gets picked.

Johnny

So, Johnny was working at a deli. A woman walks up and asks, "Do you have any salad?" Johnny says, "No." She asks, "What about carrots?" Again, Johnny says, "No." She says, "What about bananas?" Johnny says, "Tell ya what, spell out 'lad' in salad." She spells, "L A D." Johnny replies, "Spell 'rot' in carrot." She spells, "R O T." Johnny says, "Now spell 'fuck' in vegetables or fruits." She says, "There is no 'fuck' in vegetables or fruits." Johnny exclaims, "That's what I've been trying to tell you!"

Germ

You look like the 0.01 percent of germs the Lysol didn't kill.

Tomato

Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?

Because they can’t ketchup.

Child

If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.

I guess Hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.

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  • Charity

    I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.

    I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".

    Carrot

    My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...

    So I threw a carrot at her.

    Pool

    What do you call a pool full of handicapped people?

    Vegetable soup.

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