Vegetable Jokes

What do a shopping cart and a wheel chair have in common... they both carry vegetables

Why do hospitals have fans? To keep the vegetables fresh and cold.

what the difference between and orphan and a vegetable? The vegetable gets picked.

So Johnny was working at a deli, a woman walks up and asks, do you have any salad? Johnny says no, she asks? What about carrots? Again Johnny says no, she says what about bananas? Johnny says "tell ya what, spell out "lad" in salad" she spells L A D, Johnny replies "spell "rot" in carrot" she spells R O T, Johnny says "now spell "fuck" in vegetables or fruits" she says "there is no fuck in vegetables or fruits" Johnny exclaims "thats what ive been trying to tell you!"

I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn't fit in the pot.

Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.

what’s the worst song to play infront of a vegetable? “james brown - get on up”

what’s the worst song to play infront of a handicapped kid? “van halen - jump”

What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? I can't breathe - Juice Wrld

what do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed?

a baked potato

You look like the 0.01 percent of germs the lysol didn't kill.

Why did the carrots laugh? They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.

What's big round and can't move?

A vegetable

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? -- The wheelchair.

Today i went to get a sub and they asked me if i wanted all vegetables.. I said no, leave some for the rest of the customers.

Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz u can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.

What starts with a v and ends with an k, a veggie Karen

What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?

Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.

if u were a vegetable u would be a cute-cumber

What do you call a special ED class that’s flooded?

Vegetable soup.

I don’t call it special ED, I call it mixed vegetables.

I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables