The 100+ Best Vegetable Jokes

Why do hospitals have fans? To keep the vegetables fresh and cold.

What do a shopping cart and a wheel chair have in common… they both carry vegetables

I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn’t fit in the pot.

Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?

Because they can’t ketchup.

What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? – The wheelchair.

Where can you find some of the world’s largest vegetables? – In an American nursing home.

Why do they have air conditioning in hospitals? To keep all the vegetables fresh.

So Johnny was working at a deli, a woman walks up and asks, do you have any salad? Johnny says no, she asks? What about carrots? Again Johnny says no, she says what about bananas? Johnny says “tell ya what, spell out “lad” in salad” she spells L A D, Johnny replies “spell “rot” in carrot” she spells R O T, Johnny says “now spell “fuck” in vegetables or fruits” she says “there is no fuck in vegetables or fruits” Johnny exclaims “thats what ive been trying to tell you!”

why did the vegetable cross the road. He didn’t he just sat there

A missionary was caught by cannibals. we was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, “You can’t stew me. I’m a friar.”