Woman jokes
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
What's a fat Mexican woman's favorite movie? Tortanic.
What do guns and women have in common?
They both get cocked and loaded.
How can you tell a woman's pussy is good?
You smell her fingers.
Girl: "Dad."
Dad: "Do I love you?"
Girl: "I am a prostitute."
Dad: "Yes."
Woman 2: "Dad."
Dad: "Right?"
Woman 2: "I'm a woman too."
Father: "God, do you love children?"
Boy: "Yes..."
What is a woman's name with one leg?
Eileen.
When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"
What kind of experience does a feminazi have for being a feminist?
Being a bitch.
What do you call a Muslim who drinks, smokes, and fools around with other women?
Turkish.
What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?
At least one has a point.
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
Women should be seen and not heard.
But how would you control that if she was screaming "NO!!!" in the bedroom?
I was literally cradlesnatched as a child.
Yeah, in the arms of an older woman experiencing my first rounds of motorboating.
Went home with a woman last night. I was greeted at the door by a Mongrel.
I say Mongrel, it was her Down syndrome son trying to process if I was a stranger or not.
Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.
Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
"COVERBITCH, your worthless."
What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?
Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.
After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.
The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.
Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?