Woman jokes

Yesterday a woman stabbed me, so I stabbed her back. Then I realized she was the vaccine woman.

I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...

my grandfather cant a woman's taco anymore cause his balls fell off from getting to many tacos

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

What do nerds and chicks have in common? They both have four eyes.

What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?

Womxn

Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?

A: Pregnant.

Why do women rub their eyebrows? They don't got balls to scratch!

What's the difference between a woman with a penis and a terrorist? You can negotiate with the terrorist.

After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.

The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.

Woman: Will you love me after marriage as well?

Man: That will depend on your husband. If he will, so of course I would!

I like my coffee like I like my women.

Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.

Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.

"COVERBITCH, your worthless."

Husband: My wife and I went to the beach today.

Husband: She was wearing a blue wetsuit.

Husband: The second we entered the beach,

Pedestrians: "TSUNAMI! TSUNAMI!"

You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.

I braced myself when I got in the car, but then I realized my wife wasn't driving.

What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?

Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.

What's 2ft long, blue, and stiff and keeps a woman up all night?

Cot death.