Bath Jokes

Your Local Poor Girl
in Depression

Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)

Anonymous
in Sexism

Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, “hey what’s that?” Lil Timmy looks down and says, “oh that, that’s only my little red race car.” They continue on with their bath.

Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, “hey what’s that?” Lil Susie looks down and says, “oh that, that’s only my little red race car garage.” They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, “hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage.”

The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, “what’s wrong?” Lil Susie says, “well Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn’t fit so we cut them off.”

(optional)

The Toaster;

other wise known as, the ultimate bath bomb.

You Wouldn't Care Anyway

A little boy and a little girl are taking a bath together. The little girl looks down at the boy and says, “Can I touch it?”. The little boy looks back at her and says, “Hell no, you already broke yours off!”.

8
Anonymous

Go Kermit toaster bath

Anonymous
in Terrorism

What do you call a terrorist in a kids swimming pool

A bath bomb

Anonymous
in Suicide Bomber

what do you call a suicide bomber that loves water? a bath bomb

The Toaster;

other wise known as, the ultimate bath bomb.

AnonymousSpawn

One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

😏😟😈😣😖😩😫🥵

One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says “Your mother, of course.” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says “You’re so so sexy!”

Anonymous
in Nun

What’s the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One’s got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.

2
Funny but sad.

I am Funny but sad. I submit jokes you’ll love. anyway…

Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared if being alone. She said “sure just dont look up”. He looked up and said " woah what are those?". She replied " those are just headlights." He looked down and said “what is that?” She said that’s just a bush." The next day mommy wasnt home so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said “okay but don’t look up.” He looked up and said “woah what is that?” His papa replied “that’s just a snake.” Later that night he asked to sleep with his parents. They said “okay just dont look under the covers.” After a while he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed “mom turn on the headlights the snake is in the Bush!!”

Doing ya mom

So i asked my mom for a bath bomb she just gave me a toaster

“Have you taken a bath?”

“No. Why, did one go missing?”

Anonymous
in Dirtiness

You want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. You want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. You want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was the next door neighbor.

Anonymous
in Cheetah

what happened when the Cheetah took to many baths? He became spotless!!!

Baz

I got caught masterbating in the bath buy my mum! I said MUM I’ll wash it as hard and fast as I want!

HEHA
in Priest

Baptism, a chance for the priest to bathe you.

kennah
in Depression

are you a toaster? cause i wanna take a bath w you

Kaline Jean
in Yo mama

Yo mamma is so ugly when she took a bath the water jumped out.