Woman jokes
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?
A roTHOT.
There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says, "Why is a young man like you smoking?" The man turns around and says, "Why the fuck are you wearing trainers?"
An old woman walks into an outdoor supplies store.
"I'd like an infrared gorilla," she says.
The clerk proceeds to give her an infrared gorilla from the back room.
"We've had hundreds of these things in the back for ages," exclaims the clerk. "You're the first person who's actually wanted one."
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
Who can be my peace
A woman walked up to me and asked me for a joke. I stood there with a straight face knowing women can't be funny.
"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."
What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?
They wait to be filled with a big load.
Man: *behind the women* She's so ugly!
Woman: My back is not a voicemail, unless you're a coward and can only say it behind my back to my face.
What is Wonder Woman's weakness?
Accountability for her actions.
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.
Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970, and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband.
She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband?
He was a Christian, so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? The Bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes, it does, and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? That's not funny.
I'll tell ya what's funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.
What's the best part about getting a lap dance from an Asian woman?
Her eyes are so narrow that she can't see if you don't pay her.
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
What do women and peanut butter have in common?
They're both easy to spread.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.