My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."
Bully: "I would roast you but my mom told me not to burn trash."
Me: "So that's why you haven't burnt yourself yet." π€
How to know if your wife is dead? Well, the sex is still trash, but the dishes really start to pile up.
What's the difference between humans and trash cans? One's actually useful.
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. "One more picture and I'll jump." He takes another photo and shuts the window. "I can't jump, you're not supposed to throw trash out the window."
What do you say to a kid in a trash compactor?
You looking a little square.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
This whole page is pure trash. Fuck all of you.
I was thinking about you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. When I'm taking out the trash, I remember you.
What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange?
I don't keep a trash bag full of oranges in my basement.
One man's trash is another man's treasure... Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you're adopted.
One man's trash is another man's treasure, he said when he found out his parents split up and he is being adopted.
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
I would take out the trash, but my mom said you weren't ready!!! XD
My friend said, "Where is the trash?" I said, "Look in the mirror, there is the trash."
How does Moses make his cup of tea?
He brews it.
Whatβs worse than Sally in one trash can?
Sally in 13 trash cans.
What's white and bloody?
Two doves in a trash compactor. Talk about a failed marriage.
