Head of Company: We need to stop testing our products on animals. Consultant: Why? The shampoo companies do it. Head of Company: Yeah, but we make dildos.
Why can't orphans work at S.C Johnson? Cause it's a family company.
I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof
A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.
After the plane takes off, a woman sitting sitting behind the man asks him, “are all of them yours?”
“No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”
I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.
Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
why can’t orphans work at S.C Johnson
Cause it’s a family Company
So I heard the CEO gave her daughter a really good spot in the company. Everyone is mad but I think it just goes to show that it pays to sleep with your boss.
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
Why cant orphans work at S.C Johnson?
Because its a family company...
Your mama is so ugly that her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom company
Badass Toilet Paper Company: We don't take shit off of anyone.
So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business...
..their new slogan?
The Quicker Pecker Upper.
when you have sex with a coworker but remember it's a family buisness
this guy looked down the aisle and asked hey are those kids all yours an i replied: no i work for a condom company and these kids are just all of my complaints
What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
He puts his PJ-Amazon!
Someone should start a vaping company with the slogan: "Vapes that hit harder than your dad." Sales would skyrocket.
The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies. They’re always so twisted.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids company.
