Woman Jokes

90% of women don't like men in pink shirts. Ironically, 90% of men in pink shirts don't like women.

There used to be Wonder Woman.

Now we wonder, what is a woman?

How do you know Adam and Eve were white?

Have you ever tried taking a rib from black women?

How are women like swimming pools?

They cost a great deal of money to maintain considering the time you spend inside.

If all women disappeared one day, it would be a pain in the ass.

What do you call a crowd of horny white women?

Cotton waiting to be picked.

Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.

As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”

George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”

Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”

Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.

Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"

Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.

Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?

Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.

Man: Shit!

What’s one thing women need to know nowadays?

Their place.

What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?

Getting her husband's voice just right.

My favorite thing to do in libraries is put cookbooks in the women’s sports section.

What does the word circumcise mean?

Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.

Why did the woman cross the road?

What’s she doing out of the kitchen in the first place?

I saw a homeless dude and gave him $1.

I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.

Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?

Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.

I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.

I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.

What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?

The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.

A woman having labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”

“Don’t worry,” said Doc to the worried husband.

“Those are just contractions.”