Woman

Woman jokes

Lie

Dad: Johnny, Johnny?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Getting women?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Telling lies?

Johnny: No, Papa.

Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!

Memes

Period

What is a girl's favorite song when they are on their period?

"Period, oh period, oww!"

Right

Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!

Blonde

A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.

“Come again!” says the woman behind the desk.

“No, it’s curry this time.”

Magic

"Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man."

"After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!"

Day

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

Man

Why are gay men better than straight women?

Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.

Company

What do you call a white woman working at an all black company?

Crack/her

Trash

How long does it take a black woman to take out the trash?

About nine months and a day.

Life

What has 2 arms but no legs?

A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.

Shirt

90% of women don't like men in pink shirts. Ironically, 90% of men in pink shirts don't like women.