Woman jokes

So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

A man walked into a toilet and saw a woman fingering a man and said, "I think you're doing it wrong." Turns out it was two transvestites.

One day a Chief was talking to his son... "Son," the father said, "Long ago the Woman didn't have anybody to take her to BINGO. So, the Creator put the Woman to sleep and cut off her butt cheeks and made her a Man. That's why today Indian Women have no butt, and the Men are called Buttheads!"

Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."

Why didn't Michael Jackson have a girlfriend? He's afraid of women.

I like my women like my coffee—ground up and frozen.

I work at a bank and an old woman asked me to check her balance.

So I pushed her over.

Who's the smallest wife??

Micro-wife.

An autistic woman walks into a bar. "A serving of Screaming Banshee, please," she says.

The bartender says, "Ok, you seem to like it, unlike a retired special ed teacher that passed through a few minutes ago."

One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.

Why do women wear makeup and perfume?

Because they're ugly and smell bad.

What is a card carrying lesbian feminist?

A carpet muncher who is a card carrying member of the National Organization For Women.

What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.

Is shooting and killing a pregnant woman a spawn kill or double kill?

Knock knock! Who's there? Stripper. Stripper who? Stripper down!

Wanna hear a joke? Women have no rights!

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!

What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?

A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.

"Popcorn" means "Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany."

"HO" means a woman, in particular one who has many casual sexual encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based sex encountered a lot in a nazi camp.