Uncle jokes

I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

Me be like: ;-;

My uncle is an alchemist.

He can turn 3 bottles of beer into 4 hours of abuse.

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.

One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.

Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.

My uncles like the moon.

He comes out at night.

Little Johnny was learning about anal sex, when he learned what it was he said, "My uncle just calls this shhhhh..."

My great uncle died in a concentration camp.

He fell off one of the guard towers.

When you accidentally wipe a little too hard and your finger goes up your bumhole, triggering flashbacks of when you were 10 and your uncle stayed a few weeks. 😂

Why are uncles like curries?

Because bad ones hurt your asshole.

All these 9/11 jokes need to stop.

My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loves: flying planes.

My uncle can't walk straight. I think it's because he's gay.

I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.

Or is she asking her son, "Do you know Newton?"

The boy said, "No, I don't know."

She said to him, "If you had paid attention to your lessons, you would have known him!"

The boy said, "Ok, do you know Ikhlod?"

She said to him, "No, who is she?"

He said to her, "If you had paid attention to your husband, you would have known her."

The important thing is that the boy is currently a week with his uncles and a week with his turbans.

Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!

You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!

Hi, my name is Uncle Joe, and I like kids in a way that makes their parents not trust me anymore.

Noticing how wet and gentle the baby's mouth was on the bottle tip, this gave Uncle Willie an idea.

My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."

My uncle died on September 11. He was the greatest pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.