Mouth jokes
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
Jesse: Do you like my ball?
Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?
Jesse: No, they do not leave me.
Once upon a time, there was a crow with a piece of cheese in its mouth. Then a fox came, and when he saw the piece of cheese, he tried to trick the crow. He said that the crow's voice was beautiful, and then he said he wanted to hear him sing, so the crow started singing, and then the piece of cheese fell out of his mouth. He said never trust anyone, and then he walked away.
Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?
Teacher: 502.
Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
Teacher: No, you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!
Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.
Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Teacher: open door, put giraffe in, close door
Student: No! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.
Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one?
Teacher: let me guess the lion?
Student: No! The giraffe because He's in a fridge.
Teacher: WOW!
Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?
Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?
Student: The gators are at the party.
Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?
Teacher: She drowned?!
Student: No! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
What do you call Scooby Doo with a blunt in his mouth? Scooby Dooby.
What’s the name of this brand? *picture of puma logo*
Them: Puma
“Puma balls in yo mouth.”
How do you get a baby to stop crying?
Simple... you staple its mouth shut.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack can eat her candy. He got sick when he got a mouthful of dick and realized her name was Randy.
Kid: I don't want to go to the movies.
Mom: Shut your mouth and clean my room!
Do you play Sea of Thieves? See if these balls fit in your mouth, gotteeeem!
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
Knock Knock! Who's there? Candace Candace who? Can deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.
Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Timmy: *starts crying*
Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.
Your mom's been giving me attitude lately, so I told her to shut her mouth. When she did, it caused me to lose 4 inches.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
What does your dad's cock and Darryl's Savouries have in common?
I want them both in my mouth!
What is a testicle's favorite book?
Put Tony's Nuts in Your Mouth!
Dr. Brody: Sir, your son has a disease called boofa.
Dad: What's boofa?
Dr. Brody: Both of these nuts in your mouth.
SMG4 Mario be like in Ohio: I don’t wanna do this...
Candice everyone: Candice?
Mario: CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!