Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

“Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

Watson replied, “I see millions of stars.”

“What does that tell you?”

Watson pondered for a minute.

“Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.” “Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.” “Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.” “Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant.” “Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.” “What does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: “Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!”

An American, a Cuban, a Russian, and a lawyer are sitting on a subway train, in the same seat. The Cuban pulls out a Cuban cigar for each person, and hands it out. The Cuban takes one puff of his cigar, and he throws it out the window. Everybody but the Cuban goes mad. ¨You just wasted an expensive Cuban cigar! How could you?¨ The Cuban simply says, ¨See, in Cuba, cigars are very cheap.¨ The other passengers are reassured and respond with, ¨Oh, OK.¨

The Russian takes out a small bottle of Russian vodka and pours a shot for all the passengers. The Russian downs his shot, and throws the vodka bottle out the window. The rest of the passengers are alarmed, once again. ¨You just destroyed an expensive bottle of Russian vodka! How could you?¨ The Russian simply states, ¨See, in Russia, vodka is very cheap.¨ Yet again, the other passengers are reassured and respond with, ¨Ah, yes! Of course.¨

The American scratches his head and goes, ¨I think I see the pattern here.¨ So he takes the lawyer, and he throws him out the window!¨

Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?

Because his wife died.

What’s the difference between America and a bottle of milk? – In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.

why does dr. pepper come in a bottle his wife died

How do you get a million followers?

Get a water bottle and run through Africa!

how do you get 11million followers

run around africa with a water bottle

what do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye “it’s dye-ing”

why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.

why does doctor pepper come in a bottle?

his wife died

how do you start a rave in africa?

You tie a water bottle to the ceiling

How do you get 1,000,000 followers?

Run through Africa with a water bottle

Wanna know how to get 1 million followers get a water bottle and run through Africa.

How do you get 11 million flowers? Run through Africa with a bottle if water.

do you know how to get lots of followers… run through Africa with a water bottle.

How can you get a lot of followers?

Run with a bottle of water through Africa.

why does dr. pepper come in a bottle his wife died

how many africans does it take to change a light

a water bottle

Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks “why the long face?”. The horse replies saying “My wife just died of cancer, and my alcohol addiction is tearing my family apart.” The bartender responds saying “oh” sympathetically. “sucks to be you!” The bartender yells, throwing a bottle of wine at the horse.