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Puns

Anonymous

How does the man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipes it!

Little Johnny

Anonymous

little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"

Puns

KittyKat

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, No atmosphere.

Day

Jacob

Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24hrs, so they just called it a “day”.

NASA

Ass Teroid

IF You Faked The Moon Mission Don’t Apollo gise.

Planet

Daniel King

Why is a moon 🌕 rock tastier than an earth 🌍 rock?

Because it’s a little meteor.

Puns

M Miner

How does the moon cut his hair…Eclipse it!!!

Rock

Daniel King

Why is a moon rock tastier than an earth rock?

Because it’s a little meteor.

Cow

Hello

Which way did the cow jump over the moon?

  • The MILKY way!!!

Religion

Anonymous

Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.

Cow

Anonymous

Why did the cow jump over the moon? Because the farmer had cold hands!

Cow

MooMoo Jokes

What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon? The cow didn’t make it

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Hungriness

Daniel King

Why wasn’t the moon 🌕 hungry?

Because it was full!

NASA

Anonymous

why is he moon always hungry? It is almost never full

Depression

Sad and lonely

If I was an object in this world I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge I will likely shatter and break.

If I was a pizza topping I would be pineapple! Because everybody doubts me.

I’m a star! Because one of these days I’m going to crash and burn…

If I could choose what creature I come back as after I die I’d be a panda, because people would give a shit if I went extinct.

I’m like the sun; I’m painful to look at.

If I was a food I would be chopped liver because nobody likes me.

I’m like an eggshell… broken and empty.

If I was a mythical creature I’d be a unicorn! Because nobody believes in me.

I’m like a flashlight with old batteries inside because my inner light died a long time ago.

My soul is a raisin because it’s dried up shriveled, and not everyone likes it.

I’m like the moon because you only get to see one side of me.

I’m like the moon because as the month progresses my life becomes covered more and more by darkness.

I’m like an Ex streamly powerful fan! Because I push everyone away.

I’m like a disposable camera! People use me once and then just throw me away.

I’m like a shity book cover… because people think they have the right to judge and label me before they read my pages.

My brain and body is essentially a really old married couple that can’t afford to go through with the divorce and now they are stuck in a toxic relationship they are desperate to escape but the more they try the more they sink into the quicksand that is my depression and anxiety

Help me…

Religion

Anonymous

Science flies you to the moon. Religion flies you into towers.

Uranus

Anonymous

Did you know that Uranus is as big as the moon

Forehead

Anonymous

I wasn’t staring at you I was trying to figure out if that’s your forehead or the moon

Fall

Anonymous

Why did Jerry fall off the moon?

Because he got hit by a fridge.

People

Reeeeeeee Reddy H

I’m so annoyed by those people who just believe in anything they hear. This is a conversation I had a few days ago.

Idiot: The moon landing was faked! So unbelievable fake! Me: You believe in the moon? Stupidass.

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