How does the man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipes it!

little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, No atmosphere.

I’m so annoyed by those people who just believe in anything they hear. This is a conversation I had a few days ago.

Idiot: The moon landing was faked! So unbelievable fake! Me: You believe in the moon? Stupidass.

Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24hrs, so they just called it a “day”.

Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.

Why is a moon rock tastier than an earth rock?

Because it’s a little meteor.

Mooning is very ASStrological

What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon? The cow didn’t make it

If I was an object in this world I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge I will likely shatter and break.

If I was a pizza topping I would be pineapple! Because everybody doubts me.

I’m a star! Because one of these days I’m going to crash and burn…

If I could choose what creature I come back as after I die I’d be a panda, because people would give a shit if I went extinct.

I’m like the sun; I’m painful to look at.

If I was a food I would be chopped liver because nobody likes me.

I’m like an eggshell… broken and empty.

If I was a mythical creature I’d be a unicorn! Because nobody believes in me.

I’m like a flashlight with old batteries inside because my inner light died a long time ago.

My soul is a raisin because it’s dried up shriveled, and not everyone likes it.

I’m like the moon because you only get to see one side of me.

I’m like the moon because as the month progresses my life becomes covered more and more by darkness.

I’m like an Ex streamly powerful fan! Because I push everyone away.

I’m like a disposable camera! People use me once and then just throw me away.

I’m like a shity book cover… because people think they have the right to judge and label me before they read my pages.

My brain and body is essentially a really old married couple that can’t afford to go through with the divorce and now they are stuck in a toxic relationship they are desperate to escape but the more they try the more they sink into the quicksand that is my depression and anxiety

Help me…

Science flies you to the moon. Religion flies you into towers.

Why did the cow jump over the moon? Because the farmer had cold hands!

Why wasn’t the moon 🌕 hungry?

Because it was full!

WHY IS THE MOON RED TODAY?The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.

Why did Jerry fall off the moon?

Because he got hit by a fridge.

why is he moon always hungry? It is almost never full

Why is a moon 🌕 rock tastier than an earth 🌍 rock?

Because it’s a little meteor.

Why did the cow go to space ?to go to the moon

Earlier that day… Mars:Okay Venus, you need to stop with the puns Mission on space Mars:Moon?You okay? Moon:… Mars:Moon come on! Stop SPACING out! Venus and Moon giving her the smirk

How does the moon cut his hair…Eclipse it!!!