Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an autistic kid who just saw Transformers? Autistimus Prime.
Do you know Putin?
Put in these balls in your mouth.
Q: Why did frosty pull down his pants? A: He heard the snowblower coming.
Your hairline is so bad that it makes Lebron's hairline look normal.
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?
Because it’s a little meteor.
Why do orphans like to play GTA?
Because it's the only time they are wanted.
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.
Why are mountains always tired? Because they don't Everest.
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. "My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane," and his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?" The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."
Me and my friend went to the park. After a while, we grabbed our little princess and said, "It's time to go, sweetie." But before we could go, someone said, "Stop them, they have my daughter!"
A programmer and his wife.
She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."
After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.
The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"
He replies, "They had eggs."
Who says Rihanna isn't charitable?
I mean, she found Johnny Depp for her fashion show by scouting for people living in tents down in Skid Row.
I was thinking about you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What did me and my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What do you call a bad amputation?
A rip-off.
What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?
The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.
The first time riding my bike was a lot like my first time having sex.
It was hot. I was sweaty, but my sister had her hands on my shoulders all the time.
Someone who was working in the tower must've put their phone on plane mode.