Worst Jokes Ever
I was blessed with a 9-inch dick. Fair to say that priest is in jail now.
Broccoli says, "I look like a tree."
Walnut says, "I look like a brain."
Cashew says, "I look like a kidney."
Banana says, "Can we change the topic please?"
Doctor: "Does your penis burn after intercourse?"
Patient: "I don't know. I never tried lighting it."
what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.
Age is just a number,
Jail is just a room.
What's the difference between Clint Eastwood and anal sex?
One will make your day, and the other will make your hole weak.
What was Hitler's lucky number?
Nein.
What is an orphan's favorite show?
Batman.
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
All orphans must be gay because they are not home o'fobic.
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
Me: Hey, are your parents home?
Orphan: (crying) Stop calling here!
Why didn't Trump beat Biden?
Because he couldn't trump that bitch!
A teacher in Scunthorpe asks a class what their favorite football team is, saying, "Raise your hand if it is Scunthorpe." Every student but one raised their hand. The teacher asks, "Why don't you support Scunthorpe?" The child answers, "My parents support Grimsby, and so do I." The teacher comes back with, "Why are you copying your parents? What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad a druggie?" The child answers, "Then I'd support Scunthorpe like you dirty bastards!"
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.