Worst Jokes Ever
Joe Biden's speeches are so motivational. In fact, I have been stuck at home these past few weeks, and his well articulated words were enough for me to muster up the courage to jump off of a 10 story building.
Yo mama is so fat, that when I unfollowed her on Instagram, my phone got 1 GB of storage.
I was blessed with a 9 inch penis.
The priest is in jail now.
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much, so I unplugged his life support. Luckily, I remember his last words: "You little bastard!"
Chuck Norris gets pulled over by a cop, and the cop gets a ticket.
What's the difference between an asshole and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
It's the season of giving, so I'll be giving up!
What do you call an epileptic kid eating fruits?
A blender.
My wife asked me to help cure her from sucking her thumb. So I drew a cock on it.
What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers? A virgin.
Unlike my syndrome, I keep my chin up. 🙌🏽😁
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One's made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with, the other one carries your shopping.
What do you call an orphan taking a picture with it's family?
A self-fie.
My girlfriend asked me if we could have anal sex, and I said, "What's that?" She said, "I fuck her ass." I said, "Oh, my uncle calls that shhhhh."
How to punish a blind kid, rearrange his bedroom.
What starts off fun and ends in bankruptcy?
UNPROTECTED SEX.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.
A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.