Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Sally stay in school?
Because she has no arms, she can’t open the door, and the teacher left!
What kind of fruit can fix your toilet?
A plum-mer.
What is a snake’s favourite subject?
Hiss-tory!
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
It wasn't peeling well.
What kind of pizza do Asians get?
Prain.
Yo mama is so old, when I told her to act her age, she died.
Yo mama is so hairy that she uses a lawn mower to shave.
Yo mama is so nasty that she sucked your dad's dick and came in to kiss you goodnight.
What do pedophiles and guitars have in common?
They both fingered A minor.
Why were the Twin Towers mad at 9/11?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
So I was sitting on my couch, watching this homophobic TV show all about "straight and great". But then I remember, "Aren't I part of the LGBTQ?"
So I say, "Oh my God, let's throw it out the window because that would be a good idea!" But then it gets run over by 123,456,789 cars. It gave me a $150,000 fine. Guess I'm broke.
Q. When is it bedtime at Jeffrey Epstein's house? A. When the big hand touches the little hand.
Yo momma so old, she was at Cain and Abel's baby shower.
What do you get when you cross Freddie Mercury and Dracula?
A dead man with AIDS.
Yo mama is so stupid that she called pest control for gym rats.
Yo mama is so old that she had the first written copy of the Bible.
What do you get when you cross a blonde chick and a garden tool?
A dumbass hoe.
Your momma is so fat, she eats insulation and thinks it's cotton candy.
Why are there so few Arab soldiers? Because they always commit suicide on their first day.
Why are hurricanes like women? Because they come into your life, take nearly everything, and leave.