Worst Jokes Ever
I throw a flashbang in a room full of epileptics...
They were shaking in excitement!
My dad was such a good man. RIP, Osama bin Laden.
What does Ben 10 call his wife?
Humungouswhore
I got kicked off Ancestry for asking if anyone wants to fuh.
I got, I got, I got royalty inside my penis, or however the song goes.
I have a crush on my sister!
I always enjoy family reunions.
It's always a good time meeting up with my exes.
Why does family love family?
Because everyone has their Friday night nut together.
Why does a brother love his sister?
Because he came in her.
Sister: "Has anyone seen my clothes?"
Brother: "They're still in my bed."
I saw two deaf people talking shit about me in sign language.
So I turned off the lights.
How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?
The weird moaning sounds when you try to slide in the back door.
Followed by slipping in Kentucky (KY) Jelly.
Followed by landing in deep shit.
Followed by being totally covered in sea men.
Yo mamma is so slutty, she uses a submarine as a dildo because it's long, hard, and filled with seamen.
What's the difference between ICE and ISIS?
One of them says their prayers five times a day.
"Thank you for letting me borrow your wife."
*darned autocorrect*
"Thank you for letting me borrow your wi-fi"
I have a crush on a girl and both her parents are millionaires.
I guess that gives the term "Eat the rich" a whole new meaning.
What did the priest say to the other priest during baptism?
"We better clean our sex toys before we play with them."
How can you tell a woman's pussy is good?
You smell her fingers.
What's the difference between an office worker and a vegetable?
They both sit in "wheelchairs," but only one can get out of it.
What is the best item at a Mexican Burger King?
Hopper Jr.