Worst Jokes Ever
Why was the 19th Amendment a major mistake?
Because it gave women the ability to dodge accountability.
Why was the Civil Rights movement a major mistake?
Because it gave blacks an excuse to act like complete apes.
What are Eric and Dylan known for at Columbine High School?
They pulled the greatest senior prank in all of history.
What is Wonder Woman's weakness?
Accountability for her actions.
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake!
Why don't fish play basketball?
Because they're scared of the net!
Why can't you play the guitar on a fish?
Because you can't tuna fish!
What do you call an American bee?
A USB!
What fruit likes to go down the slide?
Kiwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
That's all my jokes in mind, y'all!
How do you spell bee reversed?
əəq
When I was scrolling through Instagram, my brother said, "Touch grass," but I was drinking matcha, so I opened the cap, poured it all over my hands, and rubbed it all over him.
Did y'all know our future president is probably saying "Six Seven" and other brainrot right now?
What were the clownfish doing behind the coral?
Unspeakable things.
I watched a potato farmer get arrested the other day.
She kept yelling, "Do you know who I yam?"
Two sperms are racing towards the ovaries. One looks at the other and says, "Are we there yet?"
The other says, "No, we’ve got a long way to go. We’ve only passed the tonsils."
What does a mermaid do when she gets hurt?
Goes to the nurse shark.
What do you call a dancing chair?
Ring around a Rosie.
What do you call a disabled man with a gun?
"Special forces."
Today a canvasser came to my door asking if I wanted to make a donation to protect women in the Congo.
I told her no.
The canvasser got a little upset with me and said, "Don't you know that the Congo is the rape capital of the world?"
"Then they should be used to it by now," I replied.
What's Dr. Phil's least favorite music genre?
Emo.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
If you are a female pedo, I am looking for you.
And if you want, I'll give you my wand.
Where was Emily during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Why did little Jonny drop his ice cream?
He was hit by a bus.
What do you call a puffer fish? A fish!