Worst Jokes Ever

Okay, guys. Today we're gonna read the Women's Rights of 1920...

Okay, thanks for watching!

What do you call a gay baseball player? A homo-run-sexual.

I was in bio when my teacher asked what would happen if all predators were gone in an ecosystem.

The kid in the back raised his hand and said, "So what IS gonna happen to you?"

Summary of Twilight in one sentence:

Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.

What's the difference between a priest and customer service?

At least you can call customer service and tell them how your experience was.

Three girls were lined up for execution. The black-haired one, being the smart one, turned around and yelled, "Tornado!"

Everyone panicked, and she escaped. The red-headed one, following her example, shouted as the executioners got back, "Hurricane!"

The red-headed friend escaped too. Now, it was the blonde's turn. Following both her friends, she turned to the executioners and yelled:

"Fire!"

How To Kill A Blonde 101:

First Step: Get a pool.

Second Step: Put a scratch-and-sniff at the bottom.

My dad died a while ago.

I try to think of the happy thoughts. At least he died doing what he loved—sleeping.

Today I asked my best friend what their favorite joke was. They started waving their hands around, and I thought it was a sign to go, thinking I had offended them or something. Turns out they were mute...

I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"

Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."

Why does the Avon lady walk funny?

Because her lipstick!

Why are telephone poles so far apart?

So Black people can’t swing to work.

A girl kept looking through the window whilst the boys got changed!

I, as a boy, was getting annoyed, so I found an interesting magazine in the corner. So, what did I do? Reload and fire!

My friend went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog in a crate.

He said it was a Shitzoo!

Isn't Barbie supposed to come with Ken?

Barbie comes with G.I. Joe. She fakes it with Ken.

Why do people use terms like "sucky" to mean that they don't like something?

If something "sucks," shouldn't that signify that it is at least good for one thing and will bring pleasure?

I want to be a pornstar. Even if I completely suck, they will still give me a firm raise.

Your hairline is so back down, it is in your neck.

What is the difference between a man peering through the keyhole and a woman in the bath?

One is rude and nosy; the other is nude and Rosy.

I tried phone sex once, lost my bits to a stray "call waiting" beep. Very painful. Never again.