Worst Jokes Ever
Why are orphans so bad at playing poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
FBI wants my penis, can I hide it in you?
What do a woman construction worker and a woman activist have in common?
They just stand there and hold the sign.
If a woman’s version of marriage is "happy wife, happy life," but statistically men are more likely to kill themselves, so who should be making who happy?
Then a man’s is "happy husband, don’t get bludgeoned."
Men should pay for dates because women have to pay for expensive things like makeup because God didn’t finish their faces.
I love 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑
I want to put my 🍆 in some.
How do you make sure a rape victim doesn’t testify against you?
Kill her first.
What is a woman?
A walking vagina who nags.
I've the biggest cock. Suck it.
What do you call a robot that feels like the opposite gender?
A transformer.
What's that thing that walks on two legs, washes dishes, sucks my cock, cooks, cleans, bends over for me and never fucking shuts up?
Femoids.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Mountain Dew was a real mountain.
When there's a news story of people who have died en masse, for example from explosions and fires.
Other people are all "oh no that's terrible!"
Pfft shut up, lying asshole. Trying to be "nice".
I'm like "YAY EXCITING. I don't like being bored hearing 'good news' all of the time."
What's the difference between Christianity and Scientology?
One is accepted as a cult by most people and the other has most people brainwashed.
What's the difference between a Christian and a schizophrenic?
Nothing.
What do you get when you combine Michael J. Fox and a cow?
A milkshake.
Pretend you're an orphan and I'm telling you a joke:
Your mom.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
None, they both eat out.
How do you stop a gang of black men from raping a white girl?
Throw them a basketball.
I'm gonna crack Explain Bear.