Worst Jokes Ever
Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*
What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?
When I found out they liked me back. Not interested in someone with poor judgment.
Are you Wi-Fi? Because I think I am finding a connection.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
Why don’t orphans know how to use a phone?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why is it so easy bullying orphans?
They can’t tell their mom.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
He was just feeling like he needed a break, you know? Life is hard when you're a rooster looking after your hen and chicks. He just wanted a sense of normality, walking out of the farm. He felt light-headed, staring into the distance. Then, at this very moment, he realised it was his darkest hour.
Join us for more of the story, after the break!
What do you call a down syndrome person that was hit by a car?
Mash potato.
My dad has the heart of a soldier, and a restraining order from the soldier's family.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pikachu? Pikachu, I choose you!
Why don't North Koreans like jazz music?
Because they don't have soul.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain. "Quick, let's swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!"
What do you call an angry Texan?
A Confederate leader.
Fred and Mary got married, but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's parent's home for their first night together.
In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet.
She replies, "No".
Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school."
Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
She replies, "No."
Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school."
After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
His mom says "No."
He asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His Mom replies, "Ok, do tell me what you think?"
He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue."
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan is typing...
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
I feel bad for the guy in 9/11 who ordered a salami pizza. Instead, he just got a plane.
(sorry in advance this joke is brutal)
What has 12 heads and 24 eyes?
The bin at the back of the abortion clinic.
What has eight legs and leaves kids alone? The Jackson 4.