Worst Jokes Ever
What does B.I.B.L.E. stand for?
Bull Shit In Book Lacking Evidence.
Does it cycle now?
I don't like these Undertale jokes. They just don't make any sense.
What did the bee say after the execution? "The criminal has been beeheaded!"
Your forehead is so large, if I drew an H on it, maybe Kobe could've landed.
What's the difference between drugs and children? I don't sell drugs.
Why were glow-in-the-dark condoms made?
To play Star Wars.
Why are most absent dads mechanics?
They like to nut and bolt.
Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.
One time, I broke up with my Roblox girlfriend by sending her a message. Thirty seconds later, I heard my uncle crying in the next room.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill’s candy, but Jack had a shock with a mouth full of cock cause Jill’s real name was Randy.
With a tight cheeked fanny and shlong expandy, Jack’s face turned uncanny. Off he ranny to tell granny his best friend was a tranny.
Q: What’s a koala's favorite drink?
A: Coca Koala.
What is common in my AirPods and the Titanic?
They sync properly.
Covid said to stay 6 feet... I didn't think Kobe meant it literally.
What's the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?
Straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo."
A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do."
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
So there's a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says, "Step on a crack and you break your mother's back." The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother's back breaking.
The little girl's father looks in terror, she then says, "Step on a line and you break your father's spine." The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out "OW MY SPINE!" The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
Are you suicide, 'cause you're always on my mind?