Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Why was the orphan's first phone an iPhone X? Because it didn't have a home button.

I'm actually against abortion.

Just go to the car wash and tell 'em you ate too much red pasta!

I was watching my daughter at a park. She was playing with a few people. Another parent came up to me and said, "Which one is yours?" Just for fun, I said, "I am still choosing." She looked horrified.

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

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  • In a cruel twist of irony, Stephen Hawking's favorite song was "I've Got the Power."

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  • What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."

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  • An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator.

    "Where are you heading today?" the man asks.

    "I'm going down to give blood."

    "How much do you get paid for giving blood?"

    "About $30."

    "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100."

    The woman, slightly annoyed, gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again.

    "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?"

    "Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.

    What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

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  • What did the soldier say when he sees a terrorist in a wheelchair?

    RC-XD incoming.

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  • If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs. Biden can't get it.

    Biden: *falls over on steps*