Worst Jokes Ever
There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.
Ring ring.
Abortion clinic!
Where no fetus can beat us.
Q. What鈥檚 white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
A young man was crossing the road when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I will turn into a beautiful princess." The man took the frog, smiled at it, and put it in his wallet.
The frog called out again, "If you kiss me and I turn into a princess, I will live with you for a week and do everything you want." The young man took the frog out, smiled, and put it back.
Then the frog called out, "Okay, okay! I will be with you and do whatever you want forever!" The young man laughed and put it back in his wallet.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is wrong with you? I'm offering to be a beautiful princess! Why won't you kiss me?"
The young man said, "Listen, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is pretty cool."
Why can't orphans play online games? Because they don't have parents to sign them up.
My ex keeps missing me. But her aim is steadily improving...
There are two types of people in Alabama: the orphans and the incests.
What do you call a group of chubby trans-genders?
Trans-fats.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
Me: Have you ever tried African food?
You: No.
Me: They haven't either.
Why aren't emos and trees friends? Because the tree leaves them hanging.
Why didn't the Asian get a high five? Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and they got plain!
What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.
Allan: What are you doing Saturday night?
Museum girl: Committing suicide.
Allan: What about Friday night?
Apple made a new product for Chinese people called the iOpener.
How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.
If I'm still single by Christmas, Santa won't be the only one jumping off a roof.
Why are orphans good at dodgeball?
They can dodge adoptions.
Rizz
Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.
Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.