Worst Jokes Ever
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot.
Student: Which end?
If we can't see air, can fish see water?
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
What do you call a stalker stalking himself? A narcissist.
What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?
They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.
I bought some sneakers from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been trippin' all day.
Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.
Thanks.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a Covid test and got an F.
Your forehead is so huge, you don't have dreams, you have movies. Follow me on Instagram: _zer0x3.
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
What did one butt cheek say to the other? “Between you and me, it stinks in here!”
POV: You liked this joke because you're straight.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well, I'm your man," I replied. "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
The way you talk is so slow that they put you in the movie Fast and Furious and changed the title to Slow and Serious!!!😂😂😭
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
What sucks about disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.