Worst Jokes Ever
Q: What's the difference between rape and marriage?
A: With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman afterwards.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, it's bleach.
What's the difference between my dad and a hooker? Hookers come back.
what's another name for cumming inside of a woman?
loading the dishwasher.
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
Why do white people own a lot of pets?
Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.
What has eyes but can't see?
Potatoes, storms, and needles.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids' company.
How does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.
I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
What song genre do the national anthems fit into?
Country.
"Mixed vegetables is just special ed class, change my mind."
What did the Chinese girl say when she had a baby?
"Sum ting wong."
Yo mama so fat when she went on a plane, somebody yelled "A solar eclipse!"
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.
I always hit on 16, then get busted.
Why don’t orphans work as computer repair technicians? Because they can’t find the motherboard.
Why did the clown fall off his bike?
Because the neighbor threw a washing machine at him.
I hooked up with the groom at my uncle's wedding.
Orphans go to church to call someone father.