Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I knocked on Stephen Hawking's door, but nobody answered...

All I got was "error 404 page not found."

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  • What is the difference between a Rubikโ€™s cube and a penis? I donโ€™t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.

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  • Why donโ€™t witches wear underwear?

    To get a better grip on their broom.

    Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldnโ€™t see that well!

    Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!

    Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!

    Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!

    What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!

    What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

    What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? โ€œIโ€™m looking for the man who shot my paw!โ€

    How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!

    Whatโ€™s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!

    Whatโ€™s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!

    Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?

    A priest was driving down the road when a cop pulled him over.

    The cop asked him if he had anything to drink. The priest said just water.

    The cop said, "Then why can I smell wine?"

    The priest said, "Good Lord, it happened again!"

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  • Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,

    One fell off and bumped his head.

    The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...

    โ€œWeโ€™re calling Child Protective Services.โ€