Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between a feminist and a vegetarian? A vegetarian doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons. However, a feminist doesn't act like a bitch for moral, religious, or health reasons.
Yo mama so ugly even Hello Kitty said goodbye.
I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks...
"Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea, but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
What's the difference between a dad and the Twin Towers? The Twin Towers went black and never came back, and the dad was black and just didn't come back.
Why was the dog stealing shingles?
He wanted to be a woofer.
What do bees brush their hair with?
A honeycomb.
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Man: What's up?
Me: I'm annoyed.
Man: Why?
Me: I stole my gf's heart.
Man: So why are you annoyed?
Me: Everyone else in the surgery room gave me weird looks.
So Paul Walker made a rap cover. It is called "Straight Out of Windshield."
Your forehead is so big, I bet your dreams are in IMAX.
So I'm banging the fuck out of this slutty chick, right?
And I'm thinking to myself, "She's PROBABLY got AIDS." So I go and get myself tested and, lo and behold, I'm positive.
This gets me thinking, "Where the fuck does an eight year old get AIDS?!"
"Who has my sister been hanging out with?!"
Are you depression? 'Cause you're always on my mind~
Why did the OREO go to the dentist?
Because he needed a filling. 😂
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
What do K-mart and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have boys' pants half off.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.