Worst Jokes Ever
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?
A receding hare line.
What does Michael Jackson like to eat? Little wieners.
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.
How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment.
I got an orphan an iPhone 6. I told him to press the home button. He has been doing it all day.
I read a book on anti-gravity...
It was impossible to put down.
Me: why are Americans so good at rubix cubing? Friend: why? Me: they have a history of separating colors.
It was just a prank, and stop calling our humor "plane." In our opinion, it's fire.
Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.
Why don’t mountains catch colds?
They wear snow caps.
A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian said, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."
What did the Twin Towers' mom say when she fed them? "Open wide honey, here comes the airplane."
I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
I'm logging out.
A starving homeless kid asks me for food.
I said, "sorry, my plate is full."
"Just say no to drugs!"
Well, if I'm talking to my drugs, I probably already said yes.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
Nothing... They both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
I like my wine how I like my women: 7 years old, and locked up in my basement.
I drew a picture of a whale in the ocean. My brother asked, "What are you drawing?" I said, "You taking a shower."