Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Side

  • Did you hear about the guy who got his left side chopped off?

    Well, he’s all right now!

  • 2
  • School shooting

  • The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"

    The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"

    The school shooter: "I don't know."

    The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."

  • 3
  • Julius Caesar

  • You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"

    You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."

  • 5
  • Suicide

  • My friend was on a wheelchair... he committed suicide yesterday. I remember when I met him last time, he told us a good joke and I appreciated him and told him to become a stand-up comedian.

  • 1
  • Rose

  • ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.

    Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.

    Get your mind out of the gutter.

  • 12
  • Self-defense

  • Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?

    American: Self defense.

    Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?

  • 1
  • Job

  • It’s true women do make less money than men.

    But it’s their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Whereas women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.

  • 2
  • Breath

  • My grandpa has a world record for holding his breath. He's been holding it for 6 years.

  • 8