Worst Jokes Ever
My sister's name is Coco, and one day she was funny, so I told her, "You coconut."
What is a pedophile's favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
This boy heard from a friend that if you tell an adult, "I know the whole truth," they will be all weird. So he went home and told his mom, "I know the whole truth," and she gave him $20 and said to keep quiet.
Pleased, when his dad got home, he said, "I know the whole truth," and his dad gave him $40 and said, "Don't tell Mom." Really pleased, he met the mailman the next day and said, "I know the whole truth." Then the mailman got down on his knee, opened his arms, and said, "Come to daddy."
Why did the library book go to the doctor?
It needed to be checked out.
Why can't emos work at a restaurant? Because they cut too much.
What happens when an asian with an erection bumps into a wall? he breaks his nose
What happens if an Asian with an erection walks into a wall?
He breaks his nose.
I came here to laugh.
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
What do milk and Make-A-Wish kids have in common? They both have expiration dates.
How does the zebra cross the road?
The zebra crossing.
Why are Japanese always so skinny?
Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.
Bend over and spell run.
What's white and rhymes with Dre? Eminem.
A wild Iceberg appears. Go Titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt. The attack misses. Titanic faints.
What is the difference between a preschool and my basement?
Little kids leave preschool.
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?
Throw them some laundry.
Why can't Asians golf?
Because they can't drive.
My therapist told me, "Time heals all wounds," so I stabbed him.
Now we wait.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!