Worst Jokes Ever
When you play Flappy Bird in 9/11, the bird is a plane and the obstacle courses are towers.
When the police caught him stealing the batteries, he got immediately charged!
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
What kind of dreams do hotels have?
Suite dreams.
Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?
Because they're the ones who made the toys.
My wife asked me to help cure her from sucking her thumb. So I drew a cock on it.
This is NOT my joke. I found it on Google. It's a texting joke.
Mom: Son, your grandma just passed away LOL.
Son: Mom, what do you mean LOL? That means laughing out loud.
Mom: Oh no, I thought that meant lots of love. I have to text everyone back!!!!
What is Forrest Gump’s email password?
1forrest1.
Where did the software developer go?
I don’t know, he ransomware!
Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,
One fell off and bumped his head.
The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...
“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”
My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"
What does a baby and a hand grenade have in common?
They both make noise when you throw them.
What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.
What's green and smells like ham?
Kermit the frog's fingers.
If you bet on Russian roulette, even if you win, you still lose.
What is the Titanic's favorite mint?
Icebreakers.
What do planets use to download music?
Nep-tunes.
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Me: Wanna play 9/11?
Friend: What's that?
Me: It's a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
Cousins make dozens.