Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

Don't be stupid, feminists can't change anything.

Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"

His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."

A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"

  • 1
  • If you're American outside the restroom, what are you in the restroom?

    European.

    What are you on your way to the bathroom?

    Russian.

  • 5
  • When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.

    But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)

  • 2
  • Is Google a male or female?

    Female because it doesn’t let you finish your sentences before making a suggestion.

    Two girls have a sleepover.

    Karen: Let's go to bed.

    Lauren: Fine, but it's early.

    *Karen wakes up and exits room*

    *Lauren hears noise*

    Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.

    Lauren: *laughs*

    Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*

  • 2
  • I asked a Japanese chef how to make a good bowl of ramen, he said "Let me show you."

  • 2
  • White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?

    Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!

    I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?

  • 4
  • Friend: I broke up with Sara.

    Me: I know, she came over and I screwed her hard.

    Friend: How did her pussy feel?

    Me: After about 2 inches, it felt brand new.

    Friend: What do you— HOLD UP. WHAT TF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?!