Worst Jokes Ever
What would fall out of a tree first, a depressed person or a feather?
Answer: The feather wouldn't. The rope would stop the person from falling all the way.
Hey, my grandfather was part of WWII. Yeah. He killed Hitler!
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
What is the difference between an orphan and cotton candy?
Answer: The cotton candy gets picked.
Why did they invent glow-in-the-dark condoms? So gay guys can play Star Wars.
Why is E.T. better than an orphan?
Because he found his way home.
Emo jokes are not funny, so cut it out.
What was Hitler's lucky number?
Nein.
What’s a Mexican's favorite game?
Borderlands.
People always said that if you killed a murderer, there would be the same number of murderers. Why stop at one?
My dad just found out and told my mom about one of their friends, Chad, who just murdered his wife, Claire. After doing that, he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide right after.
My mom's reply: "Jesus, Chad will do anything to get out of cleaning his mess, won't he?"
When you suffer from depression and somebody tells you to just cheer up-- Me: My goodness, what an idea! Why didn't I think of this before?
You're so ugly that even Hello Kitty said goodbye.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
Never break someone’s heart, they only have one.
Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
What do you call a bear without an ear?
B.
What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?
You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.
What did PETA say when a cheetah won 5 million dollars?
You can't beat a cheetah!
Friends are like penguins.
If you stab a penguin, they die.