Worst Jokes Ever
Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought you were his brother.
I drew a picture of a whale in the ocean. My brother asked, "What are you drawing?" I said, "You taking a shower."
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
My new girlfriend is a porn star. She would probably kill me if she found out.
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?
Answer: disappearing acts.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, for instance when you push them down the stairs.
What do you call a nose without a body? -- Nobody knows.
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?
That's what happened to my dog.
What's the hardest part to eat of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password.
My grandfather said I was too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Why doesn't my egg want to crack?
Because I hate my egg-sistence.
I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the COVID-19 patients to stay positive.
Once I tried to catch some fog.
I mist.
What do you call terrorists in a wheelchair?
An RCXD.
I wanted another piece of pizza... but she said I could only have One Piece.
Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead.
An ICE agent tells a Mexican that he can get his green card if he can use green, pink, and yellow correctly in a sentence. The Mexican thinks for a minute and says, "My phone goes green, green, and I pink it up and say yellow."
Suicide is the way to get even with the bitch called probability.