Worst Jokes Ever
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have? 10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
Your family tree looks like a circle 💀💀💀
What do painters and prostitutes have in common?
They're both paid for a good finish.
The cemetery is so overcrowded.
People are just dying to get in.
A man wakes up from his operation, and the doctor says, "I have bad news and good news, what do you want to hear first?"
The man says, "Bad," so the doctor says, "During the surgery, your girlfriend decided to leave a message that she’s leaving you for another man."
The man says, "What’s the good then?" And the doctor says, "I’m picking her up at 7."
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
I got a lot running through my head right now. I wish at least one was a 12-gauge round.
I don't understand why people get offended by incest jokes; they're so family friendly.
What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell.
Did anyone get my joke? It probably flew over your heads, oops I meant through.
If you push someone that's bullying, if you kill someone that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing.
What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? -- He nuts and bolts.
Why couldn't the T-Rex clap? Because he's dead.
What did the skeleton say to the other? "Wow, that song, 'Spooky Scary Skeletons,' really does send chills down my spine!"
My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."
Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”
Mom: “That’s not funny, you know Billy doesn’t have any arms and legs.”
Boys: “I know, we need a third base.”
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
What's Al-Qaeda's favorite sports team?
The New York Jets.