Worst Jokes Ever
Racecar backwards is racecar, but racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.
The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.
What is the most popular fish in the ocean? "A starfish."
What's the difference between life and a rape joke?
Life fucks you until you stop breathing, a rape joke fucks you until it's not funny anymore.
What do you call a lesbian with braces? A box cutter.
When I was a boy, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive... It's a good thing my older brother told me about it.
Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
A boy and a girl are showering together. The girl looks down and says to the boy, "Hey, can I touch it?" The boy replies, "Oh hell nah. You already ripped yours off."
My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.
What do you call a funny cow?
A cowmedian.
How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast? They marched in backwards and the Polish people thought they were leaving.
Why did the old man fall into the well? He couldn't see that well.
1. What's the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humor is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
2. What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.
I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield?
"Everywhere."
Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.
Dirty bitch!
My sister is pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad.
Yeah, you can call me daddy, son.
My family is like treasure. I need a map and shovel to find them.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
You reload and keep shooting.