Worst Jokes Ever
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.
My grandma refused to be an organ donor. She was buried with all her musical instruments.
If we can't see air, can fish see water?
Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.
After 40 years, Kobe finally learned to pass.
There is this celebrity everybody thought was so down to earth. That was until he hung himself.
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
Why did the cat cross the road?
To make a catastrophy on the road.
If you were on the Titanic and you didn't leave the ship, what would you do? Just let that sink in.
What's an orphan's favorite song?
"Gimme Shelter."
Why do orphans have to have customized phones? Because there aren't home buttons.
Before Marriage Boy: At last, I can hardly wait! Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No, don't even think about it! Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of course, always! Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: No, why are you asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get! Girl: Will you slap me? Boy: Hell nah, you crazy!! Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yeah girl! Girl: Oh Honeyyy😍
After Marriage Now, read that from the bottom to the top.
What is the fastest thing in the world?
James Charles when he sees little boys.
My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.
Roses are red, potato chips are savory...
The United States prison system is legalized slavery.
I came here to laugh.
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."
What do you call a redneck on fire?
A fire cracker.