Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
I got raped by my therapist... now I know where the name comes from!
My friend, while we are shopping and I'm telling her about my mental illness: "You're priceless."
When we get to the checkout: "I'm actually $2.50."
What is a pig crossed with a pineapple?
A porkypine!
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
What do you call a man off the ground?
Hanged.
In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.
How are orphans and blind kids similar?
They both have never seen their parents :)
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
What would MLK Junior be if he was white?.........Alive.
You know how 6 is afraid of 7 because 7 8 9? Well, 10 is afraid because he was in the middle of 9/11.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you?
A pool table.
Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.
what do you call a retard smoking weed?
a baked potato.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they actually come back.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a ruler under a pillow to see how long she slept.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?
The Windows shutdown sound plays.
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because it’s inside a cell!
What’s an orphan's favorite drink?
Fosters.