Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Roman Catholic

  • Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?

    because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.

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  • Kid

  • How many kids does it take to change a light bulb? Well, it's not 53, 'cause my basement's still dark.

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  • Cannibal

  • A missionary was caught by cannibals. He was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, "You can't stew me. I'm a friar."

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  • 9/11

  • Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail? A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.

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  • Camel

  • The little camel asks his mother: "Mum, why do we have these big humps?"

    "Because in these humps there is some water, and in the hot desert we can drink."

    "And Mum, why do we have this large fur?"

    "Because the desert at night is so cold, and then we don’t feel cold."

    "And Mum, why do we got these big hoofs?"

    "Because the desert sand is hot, and the hoofs save us from the hot sand."

    "But Mum, what the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?"

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  • Cultural misunderstanding

  • A Chinese man moves to the USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.

    He bought a home on a small piece of land.

    The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy.

    He goes next door, but on his way up the driveway he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard, chasing about 10 hens.

    Not wanting to interrupt these "Chinese customs", he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.

    Next day he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees him urinate into a glass and then drink it.

    Not wanting to interrupt another "Chinese custom", he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.

    A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the neighbor leading a bull down the driveway and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.

    The American dude can't handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, "Jeez man, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."

    The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I am doing, these are American Customs."

    "What do you mean," says the neighbor, "Those aren't American customs."

    "Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me," replied the Chinese man. "He say to become true American, I must learn to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bull-shit!"

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