Worst Jokes Ever

Why is there no gambling in Africa?

Too many Cheetahs.

The doctor told me I had aids. I said, "It's your fault, sister."

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.

Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

My conversion therapy done worked. Now I only sleep with my sister and not my brother.

Yo mama's so stupid she got locked in Mattress World and slept on the floor.

Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?

Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.

The teacher asked, "Why are you in school on a Saturday?"

I told her my mum told me to go to hell.

Will my suicidal thoughts leave me too if I get attached to them?

Q: What do you call a group of transgender women?

A: The X-Men.

Why did the male orphan decide to be gay?

Because he wanted someone to call "daddy."

Yo mama is so fat, when she got on the scale it said, "One at a time, please."

A man walks into a bar, sits down, and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating, and said he'll give one shot on the house. The man said, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob. And nah, if 12 shots doesn't get the taste out of my mouth, nothing will."

What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?

Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blowjob.

When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.

Go drop-kick an orphan. No one will know, not like his parents would know.

I would tell jokes about Kobe, but they would just crash and burn.

Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."

So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.

Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."

What do you do when a person with epilepsy gets seizures in the bathtub? Throw in some laundry.