Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Arsenic

  • A man walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, "May I have a bottle of arsenic, please?" She is shocked. "Why would you want something like that?" The man calmly tells her, "I want to poison my unfaithful wife and her lover." The pharmacist is now horrified. She said, "I can not possibly give you that. It is completely illegal and I would lose my license and be prosecuted for conspiracy and murder!" At this point the man hands the pharmacist a photo of his unfaithful wife having sex with the pharmacist's husband. She examines it then looks up at him. "Oh. I didn't know you had a prescription."

  • 0
  • Bus Driver

  • So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.

    "If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"

    "If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"

    And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:

    "Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"

    Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"

  • 6
  • Lamp

  • What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?

    A Jacko Lantern!

  • 1
  • Blood Type

  • My cousin died last week. He needed a blood transfusion, but we didn't know his blood type. He just kept saying, "B positive, B positive," but it's hard to be positive with him gone.

  • 17