Worst Jokes Ever

My life is a joke.

Dark humor is like a home; not everyone gets it.

I know it's cheesy, but I feel grate.

Your forehead is so big, I bet your dreams are in IMAX.

I walked in on my dad fucking my little brother. I don't know what was worse: the fact that he was fucking my brother, or the fact that the abortion clinic let my parents take the fetus home....

There once was a brother and a sister. So, one night, it's storming really bad and the sister goes into the brother's room and asks, "Can I stay with you tonight because I'm scared?" The brother replies with, "Yeah, sure, but just don't tell Mom." So the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boy's penis and asks, "What's that?" And the boy replies with, "That's my pet snake." And the girl asks, "Can I pet it?" And the boy says, "Sure, just don't tell Mom." And the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks, "What happened?" And the girl said, "I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit its head off."

I'm a Model. My doctor asked me to make an acronym for POST because I post pictures on Instagram.

(Trying to) P-ut O-ff Suicidal T-houghts

What's the difference between snow men and snow women?

Snow balls.

How do you get to the Hogwarts gym?

Go through the dumbbell door.

I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.

No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.

I have no friends, but then I realize my true friends are anxiety and depression.

What's an orphan's least favorite movie?

Home.

Are you suicide? Cause I'm tryna commit to you.

It's all fun and games until someone fails at becoming Superman.

Everybody was kung flu dying.

It traveled as fast as lightning.

2020 was expert timing.

In fact, it was a little bit frightening.

Like if your best friend is emo.

Why is dark spelt with a K and not a C?

Because they can’t see their parents.

What game does a suicidal person who is very bad at word or guessing games love?

Hangman.

When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....