Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on how to commit suicide.

The librarian says, “No, you won’t bring it back.”

Me: why are Americans so good at rubix cubing? Friend: why? Me: they have a history of separating colors.

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  • On Xbox Live, an orphan can say "they f-ed your mom," so you can say, "at least mine didn't die from it."

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  • Sex is like math.

    Subtract the clothes, add the bed, divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.

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  • What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?

    You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

    Little Johnny was sitting in class one day, and the teacher was talking about life. The teacher asked him, "Little Johnny, how do you want your wife to be like?" Little Johnny answered, "Like the moon." The teacher said, "That's such a beautiful answer because it's calm and peaceful." Little Johnny replied, "No, because it appears at night and disappears in the morning."

    Some trans "woman" came up to me and told me to act my age so I told him to act his gender

    Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?

    Because he can't run home.

    At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth."

    Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny's mother greets him at home, and he tells her, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."

    Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."

    Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!"

    A boy breaks a vase, and his mom says it's ok, honey, mistakes happen. How do you think you were born?

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