Worst Jokes Ever
What did one buttcheek say to the other buttcheek?
"Together we can stop this shit."
What’s something you can say about vacation, but not about your girlfriend?
Next time I’m bringing all my friends.
I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.
I was driving with my parent and shouted, "It's a superhero!" But I didn't know it was an emo kid.
Paul Walker's death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.
What's the difference between a knife and my life?
A knife has a point.
Man asking waitress, "Pardon me, miss, may I ask you about the menu, please?"
Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"
Why did God build a stairway to heaven?
So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.
I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story, and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.
Why do they make glow-in-the-dark condoms?
So gay people can play Star Wars.
Why did Billy fall off his bike?
Because his dad threw a chair at him.
If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?
What is it called if you give 100 disabled people guns?
Special Forces.
A daughter asked her mother, “Mom, how do you spell ‘scrotum’?”
Her mom replied, “Honey, you should have asked me last night—it was on the tip of my tongue.”
I like my women how I like my wine.
14 years aged and locked in a cellar.
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?
Criminals are wanted.
My ex-wife still misses me...
BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!
Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.