Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
Why do orphans have water in their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.
Go commit Thanos finger snap.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
Why did Helen Keller wear skin tight pants?
So you could read her lips.
Hi, I'm new.
I asked a Scottish friend of mine how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting, but fell asleep.
You're the type of person to play "Girl on Fire" during a funeral.
I downloaded Fruit Ninja so I can cut fruit instead of myself.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor jokes?
It can't hit home.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered Domino's but got jets.
A women's knitters group is having a meeting, and they are all pregnant. They all talk about their pregnancies.
One woman says, "I'm taking vitamin C so my baby has a healthy immune system."
Another knitter says, "I'm taking folic acid to help my baby's brain."
Finally, one woman says, "I'm taking Thalidomide!"
All the women turn to her and say, "Thalidomide! Don't you know your baby could be born without arms?"
The woman shrugs her shoulders and says, "I don't know how to knit arms."
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
A retard won a break-dancing competition. All he did was go to get a drink.
What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?
None. Neither can see their parents.
I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!
I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism.