Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig? -- The letter F.

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  • A guy and girl had a sex poem competition.

    Guy: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I can put mine in yours, but you can't put yours in mine."

    Girl: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I know the length of yours, but you won't know the depth of mine."

    Kelly Clarkson and Ian Watkins of the Lostprophets both walk into a bar. The bartender asked, "Hitting on some 2-year-olds today?" It may have been an innocuous question, if it weren't for the fact that the bartender is Chris Hansen.

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  • What starts with the letter M, ends with -arriage and is a man's favorite thing? Miscarriage. That joke never gets old, just like the baby.

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  • "I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday, but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry."

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  • Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.

    Boy: Knock knock.

    Girl: ...Who's there?

    Boy: Not your parents!

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  • If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.

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  • What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.

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  • There once was a street named Chuck Norris. They had to change the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

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