Worst Jokes Ever
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.
What was the Roman Empire cut in half by?
A pair of Caesars.
My son is so ungrateful. I bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
Q: What comes before 47?
A: AK
A patient walked into a psychiatrist's office last week wrapped in nothing but Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist said, "I can clearly see your nuts."
The toaster;
otherwise known as, the ultimate bath bomb.
Miscarriage jokes aren't funny, just cut it out.
BLM British Lives Matter.
You wanna know what I want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.
"I had a great day today." "Why?" "Because Allison was frustrated at her calculator and started banging it on the side of the table and the teacher screamed, 'Allison how would you like it if I banged you on the table?'"
Why was Wacko Jacko willing to write a song for the film Free Willy?
He thought that the film's title was a nice phrase to yell out in primary school playgrounds.
My family is like a cactus; a bunch of pricks.
How does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
Why did the snail paint a big "S" on his car?
Because he wanted people to say look at that S-car go when he rolled by.
What is a pirate's favorite element?
Argon.
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
How do you make an octopus laugh?
You give it ten tickles.
How did the cow break up with the other cow? He said he moo-ved on.
What is the difference between a microwave and a gay guy?
A microwave doesn’t brown your meat.