Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.
May he rest in pizza.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Your dad is gay, so are you.
What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
What do you get when you cross a lesbian that is a feminazi, a lesbian that is a progressive democrat, a promiscuous woman that is a lesbian prostitute working inside a lesbian brothel in San Francisco, California, and one of Jehovah's Witnesses?
Why did the farmer go to the strip club?
Because he was looking for his hoe.
I know 5 fat people, and your mama is 4 of them.
Could a parking garage also be called a broom closet?
Why do people in a wheelchair make bad jokes? Because they are bad at stand-up.
I used to keep asking a woman if I can rape her until she got so annoyed and said, "Stop asking me."
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
I'm logging out.
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.
How do you pet a psychopath's cat?
You get it out of the microwave.
If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.
Why are babies called bundles of joy?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."