Worst Jokes Ever

I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.

I unfriended Paul Walker on Xbox because he was always on the dashboard.

A funny joke scenario.

Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.

Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a dirty diaper?

Answer: none, they're both self-absorbed and full of sh*t!

I love bullying orphans. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?

Two lesbians adopted a cat. That night, the cat ran away. Why?

Because it heard one say, "I'm gonna eat that pussy."

What show does an orphan hate? Family Feud.

My favorite toast for parties:

May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.

Where can you never take an orphan to dinner?

Family restaurants.

I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.

Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?

Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exercise. They got up into the air and Jim said, "Okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "What?" as he looked over at Jim.

Blue Takis?

My best friend got ligma. (Ah, did he? Sorry bro.) LIGMA BALLS!

Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.

I made that one up.

I hate snow. It's white and on my land.

Do your buses run on time?

No, they run on diesel.

Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.

Like this if you are in elementary, middle school, or high school.

Who is the king of Reddit?

Sam Ryan.