Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.

My depression: hey, what's up!

Me: go away.

My depression: well how rude.

Me: 🙄.

My depression: remember that one time......

Me: no, don't even.

My depression: that we.....

Me: nope.

My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.

Me: 😳😶😟.

My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.

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  • I took my girlfriend to a Chinese restaurant. One hour after ordering, I went to ask the chef what was going on. That was until I heard barking from the kitchen.

    😥This is offensive, sorry: What did the king say to his royal steed? "You gonna start the dishwasher or what?"

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  • "I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. He later told me it was the most violent book he'd ever read."

    What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

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  • My mum once told me, "How do you spell Mississippi?" and I said, "Misisipi." But she said, "No, it goes mi-ss-i-ss-pp-i," and I laughed when she said "pp." Then she said, "Why are you laughing?" I tried saying, "You said pp," but I was laughing too hard.

    How do you confuse a blonde? Put it in a circle and tell it to sit in the corner.

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  • You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!

    Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.

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  • I thought my wife was joking when she said she was gonna leave me because I wouldn’t stop singing “I'm a believer,” but then I saw her face.

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