Worst Jokes Ever
I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?
Tell him that it is a confessional booth.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair with a speaker?
Rolling Loud 馃幐馃幐
What鈥檚 Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
An Asian went to bed at 9:00, woke up at 6. People say he's still sleeping.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
Because they needed someone to call "daddy".
Me: I kiss my mom on the lips.
Friend: Uh, I guess that's somewhat nor-
Me: Lower lips.
Friend: I gotta go.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Because they already lost two towers.
They named a road after George Floyd. It was a dead end, though.
How to catch Bigfoot: 1. Dig a large pit. 2. Build a fire in the pit and let it burn all the way to ashes. 3. Place small green peas all around the rim of the pit. 4. Hide in the bushes and wait. When Bigfoot goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash hole.
A policeman once said, "I will never forget 9/11."
I said, "I hope not, that鈥檚 your phone number!"
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.
What do you call terrorists in a wheelchair?
An RCXD.
What do you call a cow 馃惍 in an earthquake?
A milkshake.
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
I made it, DON'T COPY!!!
The happier they get, the less they see.
Why did the baby cross the road? The car seat wasn鈥檛 strapped in.
Chuck does not cut butter with a knife, he cuts a knife with butter.