Worst Jokes Ever
What does Michael Jackson and caviar have so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.
What do you call a group of depressed kids with guns?
The suicide squad.
Why is Joe Biden afraid of getting COVID?
Because he'd lose his sense of smell.
I comforted my friend about his wife's death, until I found out who did it.
Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"
What’s another name for a woman giving birth?
Unloading the dishwasher.
Why doesn't my egg want to crack?
Because I hate my egg-sistence.
I like my lovers like I like my whiskey, 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
What do you call a special police officer?
Officer down!
I wish my lawn was emo, because then it would cut itself.
What do you call a group of white people running down a hill?
An avalanche.
Why did the feminist cross the road?
To suck my dick!
What's the difference between yes and no...
Nothing.
When the South Tower saw the North Tower collapse, he said, "I'm still standing."
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
Me: Mom, I'm tired.
Mom: "Then go to sleep."
Me: No, you don't understand-