Worst Jokes Ever
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s dick.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.
If this post gets 200 likes or comments, I will show up in a MrBeast video.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.
After the plane takes off, a woman sitting behind the man asks him, “Are all of them yours?”
“No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”
Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!"
Genie: "Wish granted!"
When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.
Person A: C'mon person B, just be happy, smile.
Person B: Over my dead body.
Person B: *gets the noose*
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
One if you throw it hard enough.
On the lines of "I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous,"
I'm dying to live forever!
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
A new game the whole family can play...
Incest.
Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"
After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because it has no home button.
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?
Trying to fit in.
One thing that Johnny Depp and Michael Jackson love to do? Sniff on little white crack.
What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?
Hitler knows when to kill himself!
Did you hear about the dyslexic American police officer?
He shot a Ginger.
What’s the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds?
There’s twenty of them.
"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."