Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Princess Diana

  • What do Princess Diana and a landmine have in common? Both are easy to lay. Both costly and time-consuming to get rid of.

    What did Saint Peter say to Diana when she got to the pearly gates? "Wipe that Merc off your face."

  • 5
  • Abortion

  • So, I was fucking my daughter the other day and my wife walked in... I don't know what was funnier: the look on her face, or that the abortion clinic let me keep her.

  • 5
  • Gun shop

  • I was walking by the gun shop earlier and saw everything was 40% off. I didn't know back to school sales were already starting.

  • 3
  • Irony

  • I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom... Until they are flashing behind you!

  • 1
  • Letter

  • When I hired a Asian detective to see if my wife was cheating on me, I got this letter:

    Mr. Wong - I see he, so I climb up tree. He knock on door and she let him in. She talks to him, he talks to she. He undresses she, she undresses he. She plays with he, he plays with she. I play with me, I fall out tree, I no see... No fee.

  • 3
  • Arrest

  • I got in big trouble the other day, though it was pretty unfair. Babies kick pregnant women all the time, and yet I got arrested anyways.

  • 1
  • Caregiver

  • What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?

    Caregiver.

  • 3