Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a depressed person?
Me.
If I'm racist for voting Trump, then you're a pedophile for voting Biden.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
There's something on your chin... no, the 3rd one.
What do you call a retard with a boner? A slowpoke.
If you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that's self-harm.
If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that's acting.
It isn't any of those if it's suicide.
Why can't Americans play chess?
Because they're missing two towers.
There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed, and they all went to heaven.
God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said, "I want to be handsome." God granted his wish. The second guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the first guy." God granted his wish. The third guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the second guy." God granted his wish, and this continued on and on until the 15th ugly guy. The ugly guy was laughing, really hard. "What is your wish?" God asked him. "I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!!!" God granted his wish.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
Bippity Boppity, I'm gonna shoot you off my property!
Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream cone?
He got hit by a bus.
Why did the dog join the marching band?
Because he had his trum-bone.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered Domino's but got jets.
What does a cannibal and a spider have in common?
Both have eight legs.
Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.
Why did the pedophile cross the road?
To get to the other preschool.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I only do anal, I thought you knew.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
Q: What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
A: You slap her.
roses are red, unlike the rest, I'm the one who has your IP address.