Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama so fat that when she crossed the road, people mistook her for a roundabout.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Mi-hee-lk.
How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, cause they'll screw anything.
I got kicked out of a library today because I put a book about women's rights in the fantasy section.
Wanna hear some famous last words?
"We are just experiencing some turbulence."
A joke becomes a dad joke when it leaves for milk and never comes back.
I gave a blind kid a pistol and said it was a hairdryer.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.
Why did Michael Jackson rush to Walmart?
He heard boys' pants were half off!
How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
Running, JK rolling!
What do you call a patronizing criminal walking down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!
I tried writing with a dull pencil the other day, but there was no point.
My dad coming back.
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog.
When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.
"I bet you can't tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time," a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, "Your penis is bigger than your brother's."
What's the difference between a school bus and my Dad's van?
School buses usually don't have screaming and crying children.
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree?
It left him hanging.