
Worst Jokes Ever
I’m like an escalator because I’m always letting people down.
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!
That's the best I've done so far.
Wanna hear a joke about corn?
Never mind, it's too corny.
pilot: *over intercom* we're all going to die.
passengers: *start freaking out*
pilot: all of us will one day, no one knows when.
passengers: *sigh with relief*
pilot: but it'll probably be when we hit that mountain.
What’s the difference between a bullet and a Jew?
One comes out of the chamber.
Wanna hear a terrible joke?
Paper
Pretty tear-able, huh?
I don't think my girlfriend likes it when I take my schizophrenia meds because she always goes away when I take them.
Do emo kids get jealous of their phone when it dies?
What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?
The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
What was the orphan's name?
Jake! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂😂
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.
Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?
Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.
I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is, then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.
What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"
Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂
Roses are red, violets are black. Why is your chest as flat as your back?
An obese, depressed mother is trying to tie a noose, but can't reach it, so she calls her son for help.
*A few minutes later*
son: There.
mother: Where did you learn to tie such a good noose?
son: Dad showed me before he died.
mother: DAMN HIM TO HE- *slips and the noose chokes her to death*