Worst Jokes Ever
What animal is good at baseball?
A bat!
Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- He robbed children of their innocence.
I hit a ball with a bat, it was called animal abuse.
What do you call an autistic person? Names.
I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.
You know why I don't buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
In Israel, they chop convicted rapists' balls off. Sure glad I don't live in Israel.
What is red and looks like a zebra?
My arm. Hehhehehehe UwU
I called that Rape Advice Line earlier today. Unfortunately, it's only for victims.
What was Hitler’s favorite sex position?
Sixty nein.
Sex is like math.
You add a bed.
Subtract the clothes.
Divide the legs.
And pray you don’t multiply.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.
What was the last thing going through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
People were talking and asking what's the worst day of the year for them.
Person 1: "The first day of school because I don't like going to school."
Person 2: "Valentine's day because it's too lovey."
Me: "Oh nice, mine is my birthday because it's when I was born."
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
They told me I could never be an actor.
No one suspected me when they went missing the next day.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
Like if you have balls.