Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"

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    • I was working in an iPhone store in Norwich when a man came! He said, "Give me a hat-trick or I will destroy your store!" I said, "No," and he started to smash phones! I immediately screamed, "Important game!" and he disappeared! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my store! 😡😡

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    • Me: Do you ever just walk into a room and forget what you were doing?

    Bank teller: [eyes wide] Uhhhhh...

    Me: *scratches head with gun* Man, I hate it when this happens.

    What does a roller coaster and Michael Jackson have in common?

    Kids ride for free.

    If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.

    Expresso, expresso, no more depresso!

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    • A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”

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    • One day, I came home from school and said to my dad, "I got expelled from school today." He said, "How?" I said, "I threw my book at the teacher." He asked, "Why?" I told him, "We were doing an anti-bullying program, and my teacher said words can't hurt me, so I threw my dictionary at her."

    I was walking down the street one day and I passed the gun store. I walked in and everything was half off. I didn't know back to school sales had started already.

    Someone butt-dialed me again yesterday. It seems that only assholes want to speak to me.

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    • What's the difference between a good TV show and a gay man?

    One makes your day and one makes your whole week.

  • 1

    • Man asking waitress, "Pardon me, miss, may I ask you about the menu, please?"

    Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"