Worst Jokes Ever
Why does the Catholic Church have a glory hole inside the confessional booth?
So a priest can give an anonymous blowjob to another bisexual man, or a gay man, or a heterosexual man that has a big dick after the priest hears their confession.
I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.
We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.
An emo kid walked to me holding a rope, and asked: "Do you want to join my family tree?"
What is smegma name?
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats: My dog is named Curiosity, and your cat is dead.
Why do orphans play Minecraft? So they can at least build a home.
What game does a suicidal person who is very bad at word or guessing games love?
Hangman.
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
How do you get bubblegum out of your hair?
Cancer.
Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?
Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.
Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was out-standing.
An older retired couple - the wife had grown tired of her husband farting in bed each night. One morning she put some chicken parts under the blankets in bed next to him and went off to make some coffee.
A few minutes later she hears a loud fart followed by a blood curdling scream. He comes out after a while and says, "Hon, you were right that I would fart my guts out. Took me the longest to put them back in."
My math teacher keeps telling me to find his x. It's kinda creepy.
I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.
I will pay someone to kill me.
Article 1: the Titanic is practically unsinkable.
Article 4: the Titanic sank.
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.