Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple's actually get picked.
My grandpa is a great hero. He's the one who shot Hitler.
What’s the difference between black matter and Black Lives Matter?
Black matter leaves an impact.
A guy finds a genie.
He says, "I wish I was better at talking to women."
"Poof!" the genie says, "You're gay!"
I love bullying orphans. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?”
He responded with, “The cat is dead.”
She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you have broken the news slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor thing's dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?”
“She’s playing on the roof.”
My sister's boyfriend is pissed cuz I fucked his girl.
Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.
I was in a library and a black guy came up to me.
"Where's the coloured printer?" he said.
"Mate, it's 2025, you can use any printer you want," I replied.
Babies can spread a nasty smell,
especially when you haven't fed them for a month.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the world's hardest riddle! Good luck 😝
“I turn polar bears white, and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee, and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid, and normal people look like celebrities.”
How do you think the unthinkable? With an iceberg.
Cremation:
My last hope for a smoking hot body.
Note to self.
When baking for the holidays, don't Google "creampies".
Google "cream pie recipes".
Did you hear about the ninja pedophile? No one saw him coming.
I ran over an emo yesterday? I wanted to let him see pitch black.
I threw a lamp at an emo? I tried to lighten up his day.
Q.) What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A.) A family stump.
I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.