Worst Jokes Ever
Why do they call me a firefighter? Because I find them hot, and I leave them wet!
A joke becomes a dad joke when it leaves for milk and never comes back.
What is the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
An iPhone has a button to go home.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay?
Because then they would be called bagels! πππππππππππππ
Where did the sheep get a haircut?
At the baa-baa shop.
What's the difference between an onion and a baby?
One makes you cry when you cut it up.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.
How do parents punish their blind kids?
They re-arrange the furniture.
What do you call a group of brothers who fuck one another?
Super Smash Bros.
How to punish a blind kid, rearrange his bedroom.
Q: How can you tell the sun is a boy?
A: It rises every morning.
cock, cock, and cum
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car?
- Carlos.
yo mama so stupid she climbed up a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
My teacher said, "I'm gonna leave soon, I don't want to be here anymore!" So I shot her.
What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana?
Tiger Woods had a good driver.
I pushed a disabled kid in a fire, then called him "hot wheels."
What do you call a depressed person?
Me.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."
A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.