Worst Jokes Ever
Officer sees a man and he is seeing he is having trouble walking, so he asked him, "Sir, are you drunk?" The man responds, "No, sir, I'm not drunk." So the officer asks, "How high are you?" And the man responds, "No sir, it's 'Hi, how are you?'"
I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after, I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.
Why did the emo kid hate the nun? (Cuz nun of them were emo.)
Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin' Catholic.
Yo mama so stupid that, when she heard about cookies on the internet, she ate her computer.
What's the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid.
Priests are called father because it would be suspicious to call him daddy.
What's the difference between your mom and a laundromat washer?
The washer doesn't take loads for free.
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
"Hey, today was great."
"What happened?"
"I ran into my ex today."
"What's so great about that?"
"I was in my car."
What's the same with shoes and slaves?
When they get loose, you tie them up.
I'm reading this book in braille right now, and I know something's gonna happen, I can just feel it.
In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places, is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between a 9 year old bun.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
What do food and dark humor have in common? Some people don’t get it.
Dr. Brody: Sir, your son has a disease called boofa.
Dad: What's boofa?
Dr. Brody: Both of these nuts in your mouth.
How do you get four prostitutes on one chair?
You turn it upside down.
Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad?
Liam: I like you both.
Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to paris.
Mother: That's means you like dad more.
Liam: No, its because i like paris.
Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to America.
Mother: Why?
Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.