Worst Jokes Ever
What do you find up a ghost's nose? A BOOger.
Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.
What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
Who did the cow want to hang with?
The udders.
"Dude, can you believe Republicans are opposed to homosexuality, women's rights, and immigration, yet they are silent when it comes to incest and child molestation?"
"Well, I'm not surprised. Republicans have to win the Alabama vote, or else."
What do you call an orphan when there 18?
Homeless.
Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
What do the movies The 6th Sense and Titanic have in common?
Icy dead people.
People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids.
I don't think that's a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.
Died and came back a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.
I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.
I now have $999,999.75.
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
Hairy vagina is like sweets with the wrapper on. You don't like it, but you still eat it.
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap.
He was high on my list of priorities.
What do you call an Asian Chihuahua?
A Konichiuahua.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.