Worst Jokes Ever
I put someone in a wheelchair into the fire and called him "hot wheels."
What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."
I like my wine how I like my women: 7 years old, and locked up in my basement.
Yo mama so fat, I saw her eat with 3 utensils: A spoon, a knife, and a FORKLIFT.
9/11 was like the 4th of July. It was very bright in the skies.
What's white with black spots? A cotton field from above.
Roses are red, my blood is too. I see a lot when I lost you.
What do you call an orphan's family reunion? "Me time."
Stephen Hawking just died. Have they tried rebooting him to factory settings?
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
What do you call a dog that tells time?
A watchdog.
Where do suicide bombers go after death?
Everywhere.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
What is a briefcase?
A short lawsuit.
Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?
They don't know what a house is.
5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.
A kid in a wheelchair got hurt yesterday. I got detention yesterday because I told him to walk it off.