Short jokes
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
Spell "IOUT", no space.
Why is 3 such a helpful number? Because 3 helped out on a science project 4 5!
Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry.
What's a duck's favorite drug?
Cwack.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?
A gay guy that’s straight!
Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
How does a paedophile know if he's good at sex?
It'll forever be a mystery because the victims [are] too young to scream his name.
What does a bullied kid say during a game of Kahoot?
"I'd like to Kahoot up this school."
Donald Trump and Fanta both have some things in common.
They are both orange and were conceived from Nazis!
What is the difference between the Titanic and the Twin Towers?
They both went down.
I tried to think of how lighting works.
Then it struck me!
Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?
The Las Vegas shooting.
Guess who I saw at school today?
Everyone I looked at. loooooooool
A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.