Cake jokes

Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.

No matter how much I love cake...

I would never dessert you.

I am about to make a joke about cake. You butter believe it.

What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.

What is a ghost's favorite cake?

I scream cake!

What did the cake say to the fork?

"Do you want a piece of me!!!"

What do jokesters eat for breakfast? Pun-cakes.

What's the difference between cake and pie?

πr2, cakes are round.

Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.

Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?

He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.

What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Fat, you get fat.

What? Were you expecting a pi joke?

How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake.

I only cut to find out if I'm real or cake.

What type of cake can orphans not have?

Homemade.

Little Johnny is walking around and peeks in his parents' room, catching them having sex. So he asks, "What are you guys doing?" and they reply, "Nothing, nothing! We're just, uh, making cake," and they send him away.

So he continues walking around, and he hears some strange noises coming from his brother's room. He walks in and catches his brother and his brother's girlfriend having sex and then asks him, "What are you guys doing?" and his brother yells, "Get out! We're making cake!"

So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says, "So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night, huh?" and she replies, "OMG! How'd you know!?" and Johnny replies, "Because I licked the icing off the couch."

How is baseball like cake?

They both need batters.

What did Hitler get for his birthday?

A G.I. Jew and an Easy Bake Oven.

Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.

What is the best part about eating cake? Your mom.