Cake jokes
No matter how much I love cake...
I would never dessert you.
Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.
I am about to make a joke about cake. You butter believe it.
What's the difference between cake and pie?
πr2, cakes are round.
What type of cake can orphans not have?
Homemade.
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.
What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?
Fat, you get fat.
What? Were you expecting a pi joke?
How to make emo cakes:
Milk Butter Eggs Sugar We're Going Down Swinging!
What do jokesters eat for breakfast? Pun-cakes.
I had a cake for my gender reveal party. I cut it, and the inside was yellow...
What did the cake say to the fork?
"Do you want a piece of me!!!"
What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.
What did the fork say to the cake when he said, "I hope you get eaten?"
Fork off!
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake.
What is a ghost's favorite cake?
I scream cake!
What kind of cake can an orphan not have?
Homemade.
1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.
10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that’s where most accidents happen?
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.
12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.
Why did the cake say to the scammer? "I'll scam you up!"