Short jokes
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
What do noodles and women have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.
Why is Ahmed gay? Because he created 9/11. Hahahahahahahhahahahahaa
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? A Drive-Thru.
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
They say Trump got impeached, but he is an orange.
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.
How does a blind person wipe their ass?
With braille toilet paper.
Why don’t women wear mini skirts in the winter?
Because they’ll get chapped lips.
Why is 10 always afraid?
Because it is between 9 and 11.
What was Kurt Cobain's biggest flaw?
He had a short temper and lost his head over everything.
Mary Rose sat on a pin. Mary Rose!
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
An HDMI cable and an electrical outlet went on a date. It didn't go well, because they couldn't connect.
What do you call dogs dressed as dinosaurs?
Jurassic Bark!
Yo mama so stupid, when she was in court and the judge said, "Order, order," she said, "Pizza."