Sex jokes
Why did the blonde have sex with a Mexican?
Her teacher told her that she had to do an essay.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
Why are black men's eyes always red after sex?
From the mace.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
Memes
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.
What comes after 69?
Period.
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?
"Damn, that's really stiff!"
Why did the orphan girl cry during sex?
Because her boyfriend said "Who's your daddy?"
BAJAHAHAHHAA
Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?
Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
A penis has a sad life.
His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him. That's it for now.
What does Amy Rose like? Blue balls.
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
Spare.
You got a spare, spare me an inch of that far juicy cock.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
Because he put the wrong sock was put on.
Hehe.
Why is life like penises?
Women make it hard.