Sex jokes
Your mom has quite the mouth on her.
As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜
What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?
"Damn, that's really stiff!"
Little Johnny is with his dad behind a garbage truck when a dildo thumps the windshield.
To protect Little Johnny's innocence, he says, "That was an insect."
Little Johnny replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job!
What's the difference between three cocks and a joke?
Your mom can't take a joke.
What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?
Driving under the influencer.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
Why are black men's eyes always red after sex?
From the mace.
We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
What comes after 69?
Period.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.
What did your mom say last night? "Go harder!"
The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!
I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
I suck my dick.
How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?
Call and tell her about it.
What's the difference between red wings and old cassette tape players?
One eats tape while the other eats pussy.