Desire jokes
Cremation is my only hope for a hot, smoking body.
I wish my hair was depressed.
Cause then it would cut itself.
I want a relationship.
*Masturbates*
I don't want a relationship.
30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
My girlfriend said she wanted to be pampered. I told her I wasn't into diaper fetishes.
Why do orphans play GTA? So they can be wanted.
I want to cream, rn.
Her Name was Lola. She was a loner. At the Copa I saw her And I just wanted to bone her!
What do us emos all have in common?
Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!
It’s funny my sister wanted to have sex with me.
I love eating Hisoka's big, fat, juicy c*ck.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.
Why do orphans like families? Because they wish they had one.
This morning, I was having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend about reincarnation. I said to him, "If you could come back in the next life as anything, what would you come back as?" He thought about it for a minute and says, "A tree. That way, everybody can look at me and admire me."
Then he says the same thing to me. I started thinking about it when these two sexy, half-naked studs walked by. One was a jock, the other on his bicycle. I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat, but knowing my luck, I'll come back as a tampon.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.
I want to see you wiggle wiggle, for sure.
Happy birthday to you, you look like a ball, can’t fit in my jaws, I try to suck it.