Why do orphans play GTA? So they can be wanted.
Life's too short to want it.
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
I wish my hair was depressed.
Cause then it would cut itself.
Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me?
30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."
I was sitting next to this really hot Thai girl on the bus, and all I could think to myself was, "Don't get an erection, don't get an erection..." But she did.
Why does a married heterosexual man want an anonymous blowjob at a glory hole inside an adult bookstore?
Because he doesn't want his wife to find out that he got a blowjob from another man.
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
What’s the difference between criminals and orphans?
Only one is wanted.
What’s the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you put the cucumber 🥒
I'm jealous of your heart because it's pumping in you and I'm not.
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they wanna feel wanted.
A woman comes to the doctor and tells her, "Doctor, my husband wants intense sex all day, what should I give him?" The doctor says, "My number."
A grandfather is on his rocking chair. His grandson comes to him and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds with a "no". His granddaughter then comes along and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds, "Why do you keep asking me to croak?" The granddaughter replies, "Because Dad says if you do, we get to go to Disneyland."
On the lines of "I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous,"
I'm dying to live forever!
My uncle said he wants to be a dinosaur. I said why... he said so I could be extinct 😭😭
What do you call a porn star that always goes back for more?
Craven Morehead.
Are you a knife? Because damn, I want you inside of me ;)
Rizz,
Are you a biographer? Cause I picture us together.
Can I take a picture of you for I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No pen, no paper, you still draw my attention.
You know what I hate about math? They always talk about x and y, but not about u and i.
