Sex jokes
Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,
And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.
My girlfriend is incredibly sad since her cat has disappeared.
I am quite sure now that I misunderstood something when she asked me to eat her pussy--and I am beginning to think that I did not get the "fuck her doggy" part either.
I fiddled your mum last night, she fucking moaned like a fucking wilder beast.
A chef named his chicken Richard and named a rooster Ballz. A guy walks up and asks the chef what he's cooking. He replies, "My dick and balls."
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Perform fellatio.
What is one thing that a physicality handicapped gay man can do better than a heterosexual female or a bisexual female that are not born physicality handicapped? Know how to perform fellatio on a man that has a very long and thick and very large dick.
What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!
Yo daddy so stupid, he went to the HO-tel to see some hoes.
What is Sophia’s favourite song?
"Open Wide" cum inside, it is okay school.
What is a queef?
Something your mum did in bed last night. 😩😩😩🍑🍑🍑🌬️🌬️🌬️🌪️🌪️🌪️
Jack and Jill went up the hill for drunkin' wild sex.
Jack went by Jill to get a lick, and watched Jill get off on a stick.
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
My girl got mad at me last night for saying to my mom that she had a dildo ready at all times and is always hard, so my mom wanted to see. So I whipped out my penis and my mom said it’s bigger than your dad’s!
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jill could lick Jack's candystick, but Jill got a surprise when she saw her boyfriend Rik. He got so angry Jack has no candystick no more. Jill went home with a black eye, and Rik got arrested for cutting Jack's candystick.
Charizarding.
When you light a girl's pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz, then flap your arms and say, "You don't have enough badges to train me!"
Why does the environmentalist pimp have his hoes fuck bareback?
He wants to keep condoms out of landfills.
How to give a good hand job?
Bop it. Pull it. Twist it. Harder. Better. Faster. Stronger. You put your left hand in. You put your left hand out. You put your left hand in and shake it all about.
None of you ever touch my penis.
Chuck Norris is a genius for this: Walker Texas Ranger = Wrangler Karate Sex.
Let's play twin towers, your thighs are the towers and my penis is the plane, coming in between.
What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?
"Goodnight, Mom!"