A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
I tried to commit suicide today; never doing that again I almost killed myself
What do you say after committing incest?
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins… I just go to the local primary school
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
A man walked into a library. He asked the librarian, “Have you got a book on how to commit suicide?” The librarian replied, “no you’d never bring it back!”
If a person shoot’s a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful or is it murder?
Allan: What are you doing Saturday night?
Museum girl: Committing suicide.
Allan: What about Friday night?
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?
“When Republicans do Politics, it’s a crime. But when Democrats commit crimes, it’s Politics.” —Tyler Nixon
Me telling my parents im depressed: my parents, " no, ur just a little stressed and want attention, am i right?" My depression worsoning, me: " ya ur totally right mom…" Me in my head making a plan to commit suicide…
A man walked into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide, the librarian responds with ”fuck off you won’t bring it back!”
Why did the chicken commit suicide?
To get to the other side.
Go commit neck rope
Person 1: you are the dumbest person in the class. Person 2: well ur the second. Person 2: maybe but at least im not the dummest. Person 2: i know how to fix that! … Next day person commits sucide…
I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi’s concerts… I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.
Go commit Thanos finger snap.
Everyone laughs when a bully teases someone, but no one laughs when that person commits suicide
my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang