By using this site, you agree to its use of cookies. Read more

A man walked into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide, the librarian responds with ”f... off you won’t bring it back!”

Why did Hitler commit suicide? He saw the gas bill.

Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins… I just go to the local primary school

What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?

A cliffhanger.

A man goes to the library to find the best book about committing suicide. So when he asks the librarian, “What’s the best book on committing suicide?” The librarian said, “Oh f... off…you won’t bring it back anyway.”

Go commit neck rope

Allan: What are you doing Saturday night?

Museum girl: Committing suicide.

Allan: What about Friday night?

How did a blonde commit suicide

She jumped from the basement window

A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said: “F... off, you won’t bring it back.”

Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner." The first lady says, “2 years, 2 side-hoes.” She got an old lexus. The second lady says, “10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute.” She got a Mercedes-Benz. The third lady says, "I never had a husband." The angel says in response, “Fck me and then you can have a lambo." They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying. The first lady says, “I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse.” “How!?” The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a dck!”

Everyone laughs when a bully teases someone, but no one laughs when that person commits suicide

I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi’s concerts… I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.

This guy walks into a library one day and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian says f*** no you won’t return it

Go commit Thanos finger snap.

Why did the person go to jail?

He committed a crime.

A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”

What’s the only victimless crime you can commit? Murder, cause there’s a victimless!

The teacher says to do your homework. I do. my friends do. one person never does any of his homework.

eventually we had to have fun. He said he didn’t do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly commit suicide.

a p...star committed sue of side her coworkers must be taking it hard

why did adam commit suicide andy went through the back door

baby > commits start breathing Mom> commits abort baby > commits ohshit.exe