President jokes
The "S" in Putin stands for smart.
I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.
We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.
An American and a Russian are talking. The American says, "We in America have the best democracy. We can stand in front of the White House and shout with impunity: \"The American President is a moron!\""
"We can do that too," says the Russian, walking with the American to the Kremlin and shouting: "The American President is a moron!"
Texans: Don't mess with Texas.
*snows 1 inch*
Texans: Please help us, President Biden!
Dude: Hey dude guess who I am?
Viewers: Dora.
Trump: No, I am President Trump.
Viewers: Why are you wearing Dora’s clothes and backpack?
Trump: Today we are going to build a wall.
Viewers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Did yall know this?
What would you call the previous president when he is having a bad day?
Donald Grump.
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."
Why were Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy very wise presidents?
They both had an open mind.
Biden did 9/10.
God- make a grumpy old man president.
Angel- why?
G- cause I said so-name him Trump.
A- okay.
G- make him not pay taxes.
A- okay...
Fast forward to 2020
G- you know that grumpy old man?
A- yea...
G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.
A- Krona.
G- exactly.
A- why do you hate humans so much?
G- because I can.
Dora, where do we go next?
Kids at home: Area 51.
Meanwhile,
Dora: Let’s go deliver the evidence to President Biden.
1 day later,
Dora: WE DID IT, HOORAY!
Young man: "Very good money, and how about the name of the stupid young man again?"
Friend: "Dagobert Duck."
Young man: "Ah, I remember. He was the American useless."
Friend: "Ah, you mean Donald Trump?"
Young man: "Yes, just like that! I know exactly how the guy managed to become president. Hahaha!!!"
How much alcohol does JFK prefer to drink?
3 shots.
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
Who is the gorilla's favorite president of the most recent years? It's Hairy Truman.
Trump is ass.
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.