Priest Jokes

7 people online
EZE
in Nun

A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!

the priest that goes to bars

A priest and a child molester walk into a bar he orders a drink

Pope pooper

Remember the confession Booth is not a glory hole

A woman marries a man and has 7 children. The husband dies, and she marries another man. She has another 7 children, and later the husband dies. A year later she gets married again, and has another 7 children. She dies after a few months. At the funeral, a man see the priest looking at the heavens. He walks over and hears the man say, "They're finally together again." The man look at the priest and says, "With her husband?" The priest looks at the man and says, "No, her legs."

Me

Two priests are in a bar one says to the other priest Ill swap you 2 5 for a 10

Anonymous

What do a priest and a McDonalds have in common. They both slide their meat in 10 year old buns.

Anonymous

one day a priest loses his cock (chicken) he goes to the church and says "who has seen a cock" all the woman raised their hands "no who has seen a cock that is not theirs" half the woman's hands went up "NO NO NO who has seen my cock" all the nuns hands went up

What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.

Why Demons are dying from Priestwater?The Soul from a Priest is completly diffrent

Three sons left home, went out into the world and each of them made a lot of money. During a reunion, they discussed the gifts they'd given to their elderly mum.

'I built a big house for our mum,' said the first.

'I sent her a Mercedes, with a chauffeur,' said the second.

And the third smiled and said, 'I think my gift was the best. You know how much mum enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know that her eyes aren't so good anymore? Well, I sent her a remarkable cockatoo that recites the entire Bible, both old and new testaments. It took a priest twelve years to teach him. That cockatoo is the only one in the world that can do it. All mum has to do is name the chapter and verse, and the cockatoo recites it.'

A few days later, mum sent out her thankyou letters. She wrote to the first son,

'The house you built is so enormous that I only live in one room. The trouble is, I have to clean the whole house.'

To the second son she said, 'I'm far too old to travel anymore. I stay at home most of the time, so I've hardly used the Mercedes. In any case, the driver is so rude.'

To the third son she wrote 'Dearest Freddie. You have the good sense to know what your mum likes. The chicken was delicious!'

Anonymous

my uncle was a preist he had a two-inch penis but when it was in my ass it felt like a torpedo

Anonymous

What’s the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest

That both like lil boys

Anonymous

What do priests and McDonalds have in common? They both like putting their meat in between 5-year old buns

Anonymous

There are Three Sons Journey Korean and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island and a priest gave them each one wish the first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.

Why do Priests play Geometry Dash?Cuz they can beat Demons.

Next Joke

How come I have a father but not a dad?

He was a priest.

Jordan

My Father touched me yesterday i called him a priest