Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.

Q:Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? A:To find Pooh!

A Child asks his teacher to go to the toilet "before you go recite the alphabet" the teacher says a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z "good but wheres the p?" “running down my leg”

Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet.

He scares the shit out of it.

Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road Because it was stuck in a crack

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom

Why do ducks have feathers? To cover there butt quack

What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?

It got pissed off.

Women are like rolls of toilet paper they are either really cheap or expensive, you use them a lot and they deal with a lot of s##t.

How do You punish helen keller.

You leave the plunger in the toilet.

Ur American when u walk to the bathroom. what are you when ur in there

Ur-a-peen Eurapean

Why do people keep saying why did the toilet paper not cross because it got stuck in the crack because it got stuck in their crack.

Why did the toilet roll roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!

Me: What did one toilet say to the other? You: What? Me: You look flushed!

Confucius say, man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

Why didn’t the toilet paper make it across the road?

It got stuck in a crack

Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?

Because it’s finger licken’ good!

What did the bottle of conditioner do on the toilet?

Shampoo

What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? “I feel really wiped.”

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil