Toilet jokes
Big butt
Q: Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
A: To find Pooh!
Why did the mop lick the floor of the bathroom? Because it was so poopy.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt-quack.
Why did the toilet roll roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!
What do you say when the toilet is clogged?
Oh shit!
What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?
It got pissed off.
Ran out of toilet paper, so had to start using lettuce leaves... today was the tip of the iceberg.
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.
How do you surprise a blind guy? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? "I feel really wiped."
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common?
Both fly around Uranus and wipe out Klingons!
Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
Do you see the toilet?
POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!
You're so ugly that when you walk past the toilet, it flushes itself.
A house has a crack. A guy covers it with Plaster of Paris.\n\nHouse: "Where the heck am I supposed to do my shit now?"