The 25+ Best Worship Jokes

In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?

They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.

My wife left me for an Indian guy. -- I know he's going to treat her well, I heard they worship cows.

i don't get it. orphans are very religious, well mostly. statistics say that roughly 2/3 of the orphan population go to church i mean its the only place they can call someone "father"

Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into 2 skyscrapers.

COME MY CHILDREN TO THE BREAD CULTT

Im treated like god when im home, im usually ignored until someone wants something.

Why do orphans go to church so much?

So they can have someone to call father

What God do rats worship?

Cheesus

You could say Japanese car fans and ancient Egyptians are alike- They both worship Datsun.

Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.

Religion... That is all

why did the sun go to church Because it needs jeuse

God

What's the difference between Jesus and a dead, naked baby.

I don't worship Jesus.

I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider transMEN as men which is rather confusing to me. As a Jew I don’t know very much about Christianity but from what I’ve heard- don’t priests love little boys?

Why does Satan worship himself?

Jesus told him to worship God.

Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch