Spiritual jokes

What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?

"Make me one with everything."

A man dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, he sees an angel standing in the center of a room, surrounded by clocks. The man goes over to the angel and says, "What are these clocks for?" The angel looks at him. "These are lie clocks," the angel says, "every time someone lies, it ticks once. Mother Teresa never lied, so hers is at noon, and Honest Abe only lied twice." The man asks, "Where is Bill Clinton's clock?" The angel smiles, then points up at the fan.

Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.

What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?

Dead ends.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.

These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz."

A few days ago, I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.

How does Jesus make tea? Hebrews it.

Religion... That is all.

Christianity.

Do you want to give your life to God and be in Heaven?

Religion

Why do you think after death the angel says do not be afraid?

Search up biblically accurate angels.

Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.

Ever heard of a reverse exorcism? It’s when the Devil tells the priest to exit the child’s body.