Politics jokes
My cat sleeps about 20 hours a day. She has her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her. She visits the doctor once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this she pays nothing, and nothing is required of her.
She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep. If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free. She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head, Holy Sh*t, my cat is a Democrat!
Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!
President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎
Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.
Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two; one to screw in the lightbulb and one to SUCK MY COCK!
Kid: I'm hungry.
Dad Bot: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
Teenager: I'm Hitler did nothing wrong.
Dad Bot: Hi Hitler did nothing wrong, I'm dad.
Nazi: Finally!
Memes
What do you call a bullet head?
JFK.
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
LGBTQ. If there’s any joke, it’s 100% the woke 🤡.
Your mom is so ugly Biden likes her.
I guess the owners of this site are braindead Trump supporters.
Vote Biden or Trump, I like neither, but I want to know what the world would say. (Don't judge other people.)
Why are Communists considered the left?
Because they can’t do anything right.
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
Why didn't Donald Trump pick up his phone when Jeffrey Epstein called him?
Because Donald killed Jeffrey Epstein in prison to hide the evidence.
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
What is the difference between a blond and a Nazi?
The blond survived.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
My favorite sex position is the JFK:
I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.