Politics jokes
Why are Communists considered the left?
Because they can’t do anything right.
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
Why didn't Donald Trump pick up his phone when Jeffrey Epstein called him?
Because Donald killed Jeffrey Epstein in prison to hide the evidence.
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
Memes
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
What is the difference between a blond and a Nazi?
The blond survived.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
My favorite sex position is the JFK:
I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.
What's red, white, and blue and crawls up your leg?
A homesick abortion.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.
My face when “Free Palestine” wasn’t a sales deal.
I was looking at our Human Services Minister and thinking I'm surprised he's married.
The things you do for your cousins!
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
I'm offended.
- Liberals
What is a card carrying lesbian feminist?
A carpet muncher who is a card carrying member of the National Organization For Women.
What did the racist Catholic priest say?
"Martin Luther? Not my king!"
How do you turn a hairy man into a feminist?
Just take out his brain and there you go!