Chess

Chess Jokes

Tower

Why can't the USA and England play chess?

USA has no towers and England has no queen.

U.S.

How do you know that the U.S. sucks at chess?

They lost two towers.

British

Wonder why the British are so good at chess? They have the queen.

Wonder why Americans are so bad at chess? They lost two towers.

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  • America

    This chess game against America and England is getting interesting. First, America lost both of its towers, but now England has lost its queen.

    UK

    Why doesn’t the US want to play chess with the UK?

    The US is already down 2 towers, and the UK has an unkillable queen.

    Difference

    What is the difference between the rook and the bishop? The rook goes straight, while the bishop moves diagonally.

    Group

    A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.

    "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

    "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

  • 1
  • USA

    Why is the USA so bad at chess?

    Because they already lost two towers.

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  • Woman

    What do women and chess have in common? When you sacrifice the females and replace them, you are more likely to win.

    Queen

    Why does the Queen have more mobility than the King in chess?

    Because it's shaped like the kitchen floor.

    Orphan

    Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.

    Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.

    Game

    Do you want to know the most racist game? Chess. You wanna know why? Because they never let black go first. I wonder why... lmao.

    People

    Why are people from New York so bad at chess?

    Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).