Citizenship jokes

Someone booted Stephen Hawking offline. Maybe next time he will stand for the pledge/anthem.

Yo mama's so fat, brexshit is deporting British citizens.

I played Uno with my Mexican friend.

That bastard took all the green cards!

What is the difference between a book and a Mexican?

One has papers.

What is red, white, and blue and makes me proud to live in this country?

The baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.

Why are Mexicans good at Uno?

They always steal the green card.

Suicide is illegal because it's a crime to destroy government property.

Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?

Because he's British.

The interviewer asked me if I had a criminal record when I was requesting Australian citizenship.

I replied, "No. Is that still required?"

Normal people: I'm my own nationality.

Michael Jackson: Click here to change nationality.

I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.

Today I feel Qatari. Today I feel Arab. Today I feel African. Today I feel gay. Today I feel disabled. Today I feel a migrant worker.

American-accented, British pronunciation, what am I?

Either Canadian or European.

Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they steal all of the green cards.

What is a Mexican's only obstacle?

Border patrol.