Law jokes

What is a prostitute's favorite form of traffic control?

Speed humps.

Why did the picture go to jail?

Cause it was framed!

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. -- I lost my case.

Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.

In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.

In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.

If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.

If I were a judge and gave you a sentence, I would sentence you to life for your looks.

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)

What do you call an orphan with a gun?

(No) home shooter.

Why do police never put an orphan in prison? It's too much like a home.

Stop sign: If you speed, I'll call your parents.

Orphans: Going 180.

Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cuz 7 8 9, right?

No. It's because 7 was a repeated 6 offender.

How did the guy rob the water park?

He used a water gun!

LOL 💦🔫💧🌊

I took my mother-in-law out today...

I love being a sniper.

What do you call an Indian eating cows? Mooove to jail.

Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?

The damages are severe.

Ever wondered why Usain Bolt runs fast? He's training to outrun the cops.

After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.

The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.

What's the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?

The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, "Sign here please."