Pickup jokes
Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.
Are you Shane Dawson?
Because I can be your pussy.
Yo girl... do you like squirrels, because I'm about to nut in your hole.
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.
Pickup line for gay people:
Roses are red, Antarctica is in the south, Get on your knees, And open your mouth.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!
"You get no bitches," said the man to the 60-year-old redneck virgin guy who is obese and balding with "Trump" stuff plastered all over his pickup truck.
Are you the twin towers?
Because I want to crash inside of you.
Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?
Are you a keyboard? Cause you're my type.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Get over here so I can fuck you.
I was horrified when my wife told me that my six-year-old son wasn't actually mine. Apparently, I need to pay more attention during school pick-up.
Are you suicide? Cause I'm tryna commit to you.
A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."
