Pickup jokes
What’s Queen Elizabeth’s pickup line?
You’re breathtaking!
Do you work at Subway? Because you turn my 6 inch into a footlong.
A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"
But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?
Why can an orphan never get picked up?
Because the white van did not come that day. HAHA BIG LOL
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
Why don't orphans go home at pickup?
Because they don't have parents to pick them up.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.
Roses are red, Violets are twisted, Come back to my place, You might get fisted.
Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.
This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.
Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Tonight, I picked up an anorexic prostitute.
It was really easy because she was only about 90 pounds.
I think I was a little too harsh on Jason.
Anybody who was conceived in the back of a pickup truck during a family reunion is bound to have a few issues.
Are you a builder? Because you are giving me an erection.
Are you Google?
Because you got all I am searching for.
Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got "fine" written all over you.
You’re like a fine wine. The more of you I drink in, the better I feel.