Microsoft jokes
It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID.
None of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently.
Where do you go when Steve Hawkins dies?
Microsoft.
Why don't communists like Microsoft? Because it's Minecraft instead of ourcraft.
I fell in love with my computer because it helps me Excel.
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? The Microsoft shutdown sound.
Apparently, rich people have the smallest penises. It makes sense why Bill Gates called it "MicroSoft."
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office account, I'll make you pay. You have my word!
What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?
1 + 1 =
Your maw *microsoft shutting down noise*
Your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using Microsoft Paint.
Isn't there a software company named after your dick?
Microsoft?
Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?
Me: Word.
What did Siri say when Stephen Hawking spoke to him... Sorry, I don't like Microsoft.