Microsoft jokes
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he forgot to update to the latest version of Microsoft.
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
Your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using Microsoft Paint.
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office account, I'll make you pay. You have my word!
Memes
I thought it stood for microsoft
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.
I fell in love with my computer because it helps me Excel.
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “Dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”
Why don't communists like Microsoft? Because it's Minecraft instead of ourcraft.
What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?
1 + 1 =
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?
Me: Word.
It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID.
None of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently.
What did Siri say when Stephen Hawking spoke to him... Sorry, I don't like Microsoft.
Your maw *microsoft shutting down noise*
Isn't there a software company named after your dick?
Microsoft?
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
Where do you go when Steve Hawkins dies?
Microsoft.
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.