Delivery jokes
Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.
I told a joke about miscarriage to a group of women, but none of them laughed.
I guess it was a bad delivery.
What is a pedophile's favorite part about Halloween? -- Free delivery.
A guy jumped out of the Twin Towers, saying, "I ordered pepperoni pizza, not a plane!"
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pizzas and they only got plain: one came late, and then went to the wrong location.
Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.
Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."
What does a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell it, but they can’t eat it.
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!
On the day of 9/11, the WTC's ordered cheese and pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....I'll let you know.
Why were the World Trade Center so mad? Because they ordered 3 pizzas, but 2 came in plane and 1 went to the wrong address.
Why was 911 annoyed at the pizza guy?
Because they ordered meat lovers, but they got plane.
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a baby?
A: The pizza does not scream when you put it in the oven.
How do rappers like their pizza?
With extra bars and dough!
Doctor: Hands husband his baby.
Doctor: I'm sorry but your wife didn't make it.
Husband: Then give me the one she made.
Wanna hear a pun?
Welp, I'll punch you with one!
Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.
Why did the Twin Towers order from Just Eat?
They wanted some plane fries.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Pizza.
Pizza who?
Never mind, it was so cheesy.
Your forehead is so big your mum spent an extra hour in the birth delivery room.